My New Ending

Post-Surgery Walk

2012-01-30T09:10:00.002-06:00

Good Monday morning!

This morning before taking the kids to school I asked them if they noticed anything different about me. They responded with things like, "You're smaller than before? That shirt isn't as tight as when you bought it? "

I replied...

"I'm in workout clothes today. "

"oooohhhh...." *bewildered faces*

"I'm going to go for a walk today for the first time since my surgery two weeks ago."

"OOOHH!" *smiles*

And I did.

I just got back from my first workout since my surgery. It was a very chilly 40 degrees out, but nice and sunny; so I put on the layers and headed out. I didn't push myself, but simply enjoyed the walk.

It is very nice to get back to normal. *contented sigh*

I hope your week is off to as nice a start as mine is!

Weigh-In ... Healing & Motivation to Stay Focused

2012-01-27T06:00:00.007-06:00

Today's Weight: 179.0

Loss/Gain: -1.0 lb

This week has gone much better with regards to my eating. Well, the week ended up getting better anyway. I'm grateful for that. I'm also healing nicely and have had a day or two with little to no cramping. Hooray!! I'm going to start walking again next week and will take it easy if I feel any soreness afterwards.

Yesterday I listened to an older Jillian Michaels podcast and she had a caller ask her how to stay focused to reach a weight loss goal. This woman finds herself sliding back when she gets close to her goal weight. I found it interesting that I happen to pick that podcast, because I had just read a post on Prior Fat Girl about what keeps you motivated.

To generalize Jillian's reply she stated you have to have your own specific goals or reasons why you want to lose weight and it can't be to please someone else, or get back at someone else, etc. There has to be a deeper drive that comes from within, something that keeps you going when you are at the buffet with friends and need the push to stick to your plan. (I made up the circumstance).

hhmm....

That conversation kind of goes along with what I posted last Friday about having to face the reality of how much do I really want to be at a healthy weight. My thoughts lead me to the future and realizing I have to think about why I'm doing this, because if the motivation is shallow I won't stick to it when I get to goal; but if my reasons are deep and with a right conviction, then they will be a foundation on which I'll truly be able to build my healthy lifestyle on.

Again...hhmm...

Jillian suggested that this women make a specific list (not "be healthy") of what she hopes to accomplish in her weight loss and post copies of it everywhere to remind her. Now, I'm not going to burden my family with looking at my notes everywhere - LOL - sorry..that's not me, but I am going to think again about why I do this and maybe even try and remind myself of those reasons every morning.

Then I need to remind myself of it every hour... just kidding..kind of. Seriously, my problem isn't thinking of the list of reasons it's remembering them and being convicted of them enough to stick to my plan for longer than one meal. So, that is what I leave you with for the weekend.

Feel free to share your thoughts on what motivates you. What helps you stay focused?

Have a great weekend everyone!

P.S. Please know I'm not upset...just pondering. Staying motivated seemed to pop up a bit throughout my week..that's all. :)

Sleepytime Survey

2012-01-26T19:55:00.002-06:00

Before heading to bed last night I read this post by Jane over at Running To Shed the Fat Suit. I thought it was a fun post and so I'm doing it today...while I *yawn* and get myself off to bed here soon. ...

Bed Time Survey

How many hours of sleep do you get each night? Usually about 7 hours.
What time do you usually go to bed? Anywhere between 10:00 p.m and 11:00 pm
What time do you get up during the workweek? 6:15 am, though my alarm starts sounding at 5:50..I love snooze and set it early on purpose..makes me feel like I'm getting a few more minutes...why do we do that?!? LOL
What do you wear to bed? Sleep Shirt. I have never been comfortable sleeping with pants/shorts on...unless I'm freezing cold, then I'll wear flannel pants too.

What is the last thing you do before bed? Use the bathroom. Always. I have to right before I get into bed..it's a habit that drives my husband nuts. :) But I don't wake in the middle of the night to use the restroom, and I think that's why. :)
Does coffee wake you up? Yes, and some mornings the thought of it is what gets me out of bed, well that and knowing I have to get the kids off to school. :) Lately I'm noticing it keeps me up if I have it too late in the evening. That never used to happen before...is it my age?!? hhmm....
Does vodka put you to sleep? I've never had even a sip of alcohol, so I've no idea.

How do you sleep: On your side, stomach or back? Side and stomach.
Do you dream about real-life things or complete fantasies? Usually a modge podge of things I've seen that day or read about, but in a very mixed up way....silly like.
Ever had a reoccurring dream? The only thing I've dreamt repeatedly, though it's not often, is my mouth is closed, I push my tongue against my teeth and they give...just push straight out. It grosses me out/freaks me out every time and I'm always grateful to wake up to strong teeth that are in place. No idea where that came from, because I didn't have one cavity until I had my first kids.
Which is worse: Being too hot or too cold in bed? Too hot.
What size is your bed? Queen.

So, this is pretty useless, but I thought it was fun and kind of different. So, want to share your bedtime routine? Just comment if you post about it and I'll come read. :)

G'nite!

Healthy Heart Weekend

2012-01-25T10:41:00.005-06:00

In the spirit of all things pink, red and hearts I'd like to invite you to join me in the 2nd Annual Bloggers' Healthy Heart Weekend challenge coming up February 10th - 12th put on by Lori at Finding Radiance.

The directions are as follows:

"On this weekend, do some kind of activity on 1 of the 3 days of Friday, Saturday, or Sunday. You don’t have to have a blog in order to join, either.

Like last year, I just want this to be a focus on getting healthy. If you want to walk, that’s fine. Elliptical bunny? Knock yourself out! Take a long bike ride? Go for it! The only stipulation is that you need to take a picture of yourself before, during, or after your event and send it to me. I will post the pictures here. Get creative, too! You don’t have to have your face in the photo if you don’t want to, so have fun with it!

Date: Just before Valentine’s, of course! February 10th, 11th, and 12th! Feel free to chose Friday, Saturday, or Sunday to complete your event.

Distance: Your choice. I know many of you are training for an event, so you can use whatever distance fits in with your training plan. It’s all about a healthy heart, not a specific distance or time.

After you complete your event, please email me the photo and what you did at javaqueen01 (at) yahoo.com ."

I did this last year and love the idea. So, I'm going to do it again this year.

My commitment is to take a 5 mile walk.

Join me?

Mixed Monday Musings

2012-01-23T12:30:00.006-06:00

Now how's that for a title? :) I was thinking all morning how I could name this post, and I'm quite proud of what I came up with.

Okay, seriously...

I'd offer a "short story" but there is none, so just grab a drink and settle in...I'm trying to stay immobile to heal, so I've got lots of time to blog this afternoon. *giggle*

First off, I want to thank you for your kind words and encouragement on Friday's post. I am definitely my own worst critic and just didn't want to sound like making excuses for my gain again.

Of course, the more I think about it the more I have to make myself realize that last week wasn't a week of excuses as much as it was a week of learning, so maybe I was a bit too hard on myself on Friday.

I seriously did not think this surgery was going to have the effect it's had on my body. The cramping and pain are not horrible, but I expected to be back to normal within a day or so. I did not expect to have any pain almost a week later. The doctor said there would be cramping and minimal spotting, which is exactly what I've had.

After a ~~millionth~~ moment of frustration at having to stay still my husband explained it like this to me:

Husband: "I'm very sore in my legs from playing at the park Saturday and I need to suck it up and deal with it, but if I had a sprained ankle and was sore I would need to stay off it until it heals. You're menstrual cramps are something you just had to deal with and keep going, but this is cramping due to a wound healing and you have to rest or it won't heal."

My hero. :)

So, I have to repeat this to myself almost every day and then fend off the tears when I feel useless. Or, like I did in church yesterday, I make myself be thankful that this isn't a permanent disability and that I have a family who is so helpful and pitching in around the house.

When I really thought about all this I also came to the realization that I still need to remember that food is not going to take away the frustrations. Unfortunately I think that is how I reacted last week..."My life is out of norm, I'm sitting a majority of the day, so why not eat like I used to when all I did was sit around all day?" hhmmm... no. Not good.

So, that's enough of that. The week is over, and today is a new day.

And on this new day I received a text that brightened my morning. It was from my brother and went like this:

Brother: Thought you'd find this interesting: I changed my diet a month ago and I've already lost 20 lbs. :-)

Me: **** that's great! Are you doing any specific plan?

Brother: No name for it. Just cut back significantly on calorie intake and started eating healthier calories. Lots of fruit and nuts. Also started a food journal.

We went on for a few more texts and he shared some neat

things with me about what he has changed. We shared numbers of where we started and where we hope to be and agreed to keep in touch on the subject.

Folks, loving people for who they are is something I'm very proud to say my family has always done. My brother wasn't heavy growing up, but I was always a little chunky and home was a safe haven of love and acceptance. In adulthood both my brother and I put on weight, but we never treated each other any differently for it; neither have either of our spouses. This is something I've always been grateful for.

That being said there are certain health issues we have to be honest about, like Type 2 Diabetes running in our mother's family. For that reason I'm so glad to hear he is taking care of himself, and I'm looking forward to sharing more of this journey with him.

I think that's it for now. I really am a blessed woman and so grateful for the hope of real change that I see in my future. It may be put on hold for a bit while I recoup, but it will happen. I'm confident of that.

I hope your week is off to a good start! Mine sure is. :)

Weigh-In ... Do I Really Want It?

2012-01-20T08:32:00.003-06:00

Today's Weight: 180.0

Loss/Gain: +2.0 lbs

Short Story:

I'm a upset with this gain, because it reflects my poor eating habits this week. I can not use my surgery as an excuse, because I overate. Plain and simple, and it frustrates me that I can get a grip on myself with food sometimes and not others...like a week when I know I can't exercise. But quitting is not an option for me, so I will get my act together.

Long Story:

I'll be honest by saying I'm upset with the gain. In fact, I've been at 180 pretty much since surgery and I'm sure it's because of the sitting around all day, but still needing to eat. I feel like I'm making an excuse for the gain if I blame it on the surgery because I did not eat the best this week either.

This bugs me. It bugs me because I knew I wasn't going to be able to exercise, but I didn't stick to eating only what my body needed being stationary most of the days post-surgery . It was amazing how little I was truly hungry, but still ate out of habit or boredom.

Times like this remind me that exercise is definitely necessary for the metabolism-challenged like myself. But it also reminded me that I have to get serious and want to eat like I want to lose weight and not solely depend on squeaking by because I worked out hard. humph.

I have found myself thinking, "Do I really want this bad enough to change all the way?" It's one thing to make small changes and then stay here 50 pounds lighter, but still a good 40 pounds away from a healthy weight. But do I want to make those deeper, more meaningful changes that will get me to my goal weight and become my new way of living?

Of course, I think, "Yes, I want that!", but my actions don't prove it. Case in point:

I was talking to a lady this last week who told me she's lost a lot of weight about four years ago and sometimes it's still so hard. She is in her 40s, a petite thin thing (I forgot to ask how much she lost, but she said she started around 190 pounds and she's 5 feet tall.)n and goes to the gym daily. She said it's not the portions she has a problem with, but the types of food.

As I talked with her a little about my journey, discussed how hard maintenance is for her and told her about Diane's blog I sat with a plate of nachos that were served at the baby shower we were attending. I've recently gotten to the point where I ask for "less, no cheese " or something like that at the showers and they know I'm watching what I eat and are fine with it. Well, Monday I had the "I can't eat anything after midnight, so might as well eat a plate full." mentality because of my surgery coming up the next day. While I'm talking to this woman I was so convicted that I'm telling her I'm trying to lose weight, but eating corn chips with nacho cheese, refried beans, shredded chicken, lettuce, tomato and homemade salsa on top.

What a great testimony, huh?!?! Sheesh.

I told her later I was so encouraged by her story and convicted at the same time for how I was eating while discussing weight issues with her. She was very kind and encouraging and reminded me that it's hard work every day.

So, I said all that to say this...I can't make excuses for this week. Had I done my best to be careful with the food side of things since the exercise wasn't taking place and still seen a gain I wouldn't feel so bad. But I didn't.

I need to put actions to my words or I might as well quit. And since quitting is not an option for me the only other choice is to get my act together. I still don't see any great exercise in the next week, but I know I can control the food. So that is what I will work on.

Oh, the pain of facing ones self and learning lessons the hard way.....

Thanks for listening and have a great weekend everyone!

Taking It Easy

2012-01-19T07:56:00.003-06:00

Well, recovery is going fine. I'm taking it easy so everything will heal quickly. Yesterday I had a too long of a gap between taking pain killers and was reminded that I am indeed healing from a minor surgery. ouch.

The pain isn't worse than my monthly cramps (yes, they have always been awful..), but, as my husband said, wound healing is more serious than menstrual cramps and I need to be careful. I keep thinking of men who undergo vasectomies and think they can just up and continue on with their life only to be in worse pain a few days later because they pushed to hard. We've heard a couple of those stories and I don't want that to be me.

So, I get dressed and then do a couple of things before sitting down to watch a movie or read a book. Then I get up and do something else small if I need to. I have a hard time making myself not do too much, but I know I'll be glad later if I allow my body to heal now.

Have a nice day and thanks for stopping by!

Recovering

2012-01-17T21:02:00.003-06:00

All went well with my procedure today and I've spent most of the evening sleeping on and off. My husband has been awesome. He made stuffing and gravy to go along with some leftover turkey (that he grilled yesterday) and mashed potatoes, and took care of getting us all fed dinner. In fact, the evening - showers and such for the kids - all went fine.

Love dat man!

The doctor said to take it easy for the next couple of days, so I plan to. :)

Is Life After Weight Loss Possible?

2012-01-16T16:48:00.003-06:00

I've been busy today getting getting various chores completed before my surgery tomorrow (I'll write more post-procedure, but I'm having endometrial ablation done), so I thought I'd direct you over to Diane's blog to read a very good post she wrote today on the subject of hope in weight loss maintenance.

Click here: The Fat Trap is Pretty Depressing, But There is Hope

Also, in case you care... this was my comment on her blog, because her post really made me think:

"It sounds like that article would be very depressing. Why would people want to lose weight if there wasn't the hope of keeping it off? My first thoughts came like this:

Firstly, I can do all things through Christ. If a person who was addicted to drugs, alcohol, etc. can accept Christ and see a complete change in his/her life, then I too can accept His help and see that same change in my addictive habits with food. And since I've seen that 180 degree change in non-food ways in people I know personally, then I know I can cling to that hope myself.

Secondly, I see people like you, Lori and a close friend of mine, to name a few, who have overcome their issues with food to the extent that you are able to keep the weight off. Yes, I see what you do to maintain and there are days I feel I'll never be the "superwoman" of weight loss you are in my eyes, BUT...I realize that I do want it bad enough to become the person who can maintain a healthy weight. I learn from those of you I see succeeding in maintenance and I know it's worth it.

Thank you so much for putting out a rebuttal to that article, Diane. We need more people like you who are honest about what it takes, and offer the hope that it can be done.

Have a great week!"

Weigh-In ... Not Low Carb

2012-01-13T05:55:00.002-06:00

Today's Weight: 178.0

Loss/Gain: 0

I looked at the scale this morning and said, "I'll take a maintain any day over a gain.". TOM arrived yesterday, so between that and the PMS cravings leading up to it I was totally expecting this. I'm very content with it and just grateful not to be up.

If you haven't figured it out yet, I don't like to speak crudely or about very personal matters publicly; however letting you know that my menstrual period has arrived always seems appropriate as it's often the week each month when I either see a maintain or a gain. This is no big deal to some because they share very private information online, but I wanted to clarify why I share this every month.

I wonder if bloggers that share this info start getting on the same cycle like girls that live in the same house do? LOL Anyway, it's just always interesting to me the factors that surround the female monthly cycle and how it affects our weight.

For example, cravings for sweets and regular soda (or even diet nowadays) nine times out of ten equals PMS for me. An interesting thing I noticed this week was that when I would try and cut back on the sweets I found myself munching on crackers and other carb-rich foods. hhmmm....

It's another post for another time, but I'm finding that I do better when I cut back on my starchy, white carbohydrate laden foods (no surprise, I know...most people do.. LOL) so it's very interesting that right before my cycle that is exactly what I want most of. More hhmm...

Well, that's it for now. I will let you get back to your Friday activities. Have a great weekend and thanks for checking in!

Movin' It

2012-01-12T09:24:00.003-06:00

Last evening on our way to church I shared with my husband about walking 3 miles in 45 minutes earlier that day. He asked me if I've been running lately. I told him no, but I'm going to get back on it in a couple of weeks. I told him about my goal of running another 5K this year, but that I really want to get to running 3 miles a few times a week, not just once for a race.

In a week I have an outpatient procedure scheduled that could put me out for a couple of days, so I really don't want to start running until I can continue without stopping. So, I told him in the meantime I'm pushing myself to walk faster. He then asked how fast I ran my first 5K two years ago. Um, 43:44 minutes.

We had a good chuckle at the fact that two years and another 25 pounds later I can walk almost almost as fast as I ran then. :)

Rainy Afternoon

2012-01-11T11:32:00.004-06:00

I thought I should pop in and let you know that my week is getting better in the food arena. I didn't overindulge in sweets yesterday like on Monday. whew! I'm also getting back into my groove with walking and enjoying it.

There are some thoughtful posts brewing in my mind, but today is not the time. I've had a lazy morning and now that I'm done with lunch I'm going to do something crafty before leaving to get my kids from school. The rain has started coming down again, so it's a lovely, cloudy, rainy afternoon to be home and indoors. I see an afternoon cup of coffee in the near future...

I love days like this!!!

One of Those Days

2012-01-09T21:17:00.002-06:00

My day started off okay, but the eating has gotten worse...I'm finding myself wanting sweets, Coke ( the real stuff) and carbs...

Suddenly I realized those foods along with an "I don't care." attitude usually means PMS.

Yep, it appears to have been one of those days. I'm not totally sure if it really is the monthly, but zi am grateful for tomorrow. A new day with no mistakes in it yet. :)

Weigh-In ... 1st of the New Year

2012-01-06T08:31:00.006-06:00

Today's Weight: 178.0

Loss/Gain: - 3.5 lbs

First off, yes I'm doing a little happy dance over here.

(Can you look at anything Calvin and Hobbes and NOT smile?? )

My joyful dance isn't solely because I lost all but half a pound of what I gained over Christmas week, but also because I had some great non-scale victories as well.

The first being that I participated in a time of fasting and prayer earlier this week with my church. We do this corporately twice a year in prayerful preparation of our semi-annual Bible conference at our headship church. Sometimes I can commit to the entire time of fasting, sometimes only part of it, but I always commit to the praying.

Usually as the fast approaches I begin to miss food. Yes, like days before I know I'm going to fast I begin to mourn the fact that I won't get to eat. It's pretty pathetic, but also common so I don't feel so bad. I also wake up the morning of the fast and terribly, horribly, excruciatingly miss my coffee.

We do a water-only fast and I am a woman of ritual, which includes, I'm sorry to say, a very strong addictive habit of two cups of coffee every morning. Fasting from it breaks up my routine AND gives the worst headache. *smirk* Both of which I dread....

However, this time around I did not dread not eating food, nor did I dread giving up my coffee. I knew it had to be done and I knew the food and coffee would be there afterwards.

[dramatic pause] I am convinced this is due much in part to the fact that I am breaking that all-consuming relationship with food in my life.

My second victory came into play post-fasting when I did not overeat to make up for the time without food. We always eat a large meal to break our time of fasting and I did eat plenty at that meal. The rest of the time I ate until satisfied and I actually kept drinking water (which I usually despise for a couple days after fasting...blech..).

Not making up for lost time in the calories department showed on the scale this morning. It also showed me that I can do this!! I'm very encouraged...in fact so encouraged I think I'll do another happy dance.

Have a great weekend everyone!

..In With the New

2012-01-02T13:32:00.002-06:00

aaaahhhhh.......

Do you hear that? It's the sound of my house falling into the calm rhythm that follows a few months of holiday craziness. It's what I love about this time of year. The celebrating is over and I can sit and relax and ponder what things I'd like to work on in the less busy wintry months to come.

I've never been one to write New Year's resolutions, but I do sit and think about projects I've put off. I think about ways to productively spend the next few months before the itch to start spring cleaning hits.

With regards to my weight I mentioned last year that I consider my years in this weight loss journey to begin and end in May. So, that is really the month I sit and review where I'm at and where I want to go.

However, as a new year begins I have to admit I do think about where I'd like to be in my health by this time next year. So, in the spirit of life goals and resolutions I have the following plans for 2012:

I will continue striving for better, in all aspects of my life - especially getting cards/gifts in the mail on time...I've gotten really bad about that lately.
I will stay focused on reaching a healthy weight without allowing myself to feel like a failure if I have a setback. It is time to finish the losing leg of this journey.
I will run in a 5K race this year. I decided it's time to run another race. My plan is to lose more weight and in turn better my race time since I'll be carrying less weight. I'm thinking next fall will be a nice time to race. My time to beat is: 43:44

It's not anything new and exciting, but when I kept thinking about any goals I might set for myself this year all I could think was I'll just keep doing what I know to do. No new diet, no tricks. Just the simple act of doing.

And I know doing it, instead of talking about doing it, is what will help me continue on in my new ending. :)

p.s. Can I also throw out there that I need to work on not being afraid to be the new Leah? Someday I'll write about that, but it's a struggle I face on and off...being okay with letting the old habits go and allowing myself to be a woman I only dreamed of being before..in more ways than my weight too. Another topic for another time...

Out with the old...

2011-12-31T15:37:00.007-06:00

The common theme on blogs this weekend is year end reflections and new year resolutions. As I think about what I can share I come up empty.

This past week was a bit emotional for me and I'm afraid if I sit and ponder 2011 I might end up in tears. However, I know that I can not live in regret, only learn from my mistakes and be grateful for the wonderful things that did happen this past year.

A few being...

My husband graduated from dental school in June, finishing eight long years of college.

During our move from one state to another we enjoyed a family vacation like we've never taken before, eating yummy cajun food in New Orleans

and wearing ourselves out with all the adventures to be had at Disney World.

The kids settled into middle school in our new hometown nicely and have done awesome with the move.

This move all the way to the east coast has also afforded us the opportunity to visit my grandparent's home for the first time. That trip including many wonderful moments like learning to shoot a gun.

And since this is my health blog I can't leave out reaching 50 pounds lost last spring...

...and managing to keep it off until now.

I've also put my Garmin to good use since moving here and continuing my exercise in the out of doors versus the gym I used in Oklahoma.

You know now that I really think about it...2011 hasn't been bad at all. There have been mistakes, but I daresay there have been more of those moments that will bless my life for many years to come.

In fact, as I finish up this post and time of pondering...I am reminded God has been so good to me and my family. I will not allow myself to send 2011 on with the baggage of regret. I will instead enjoy the good things and take to heart the lessons learned.

Have a safe and fun New Years Eve!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Final Update

2011-12-30T07:40:00.005-06:00

Today's Weight: 181.5

Loss/Gain: +4 lbs

No, I'm not surprised. Unfortunately my Christmas Day did turn into a Christmas week. I wouldn't have even posted my weight today, because I know the weight is not going to stay on, except that I promised myself to be honest on this blog, whether up or down.

So, there it is. Once again I'm up a good amount during the Christmas break. It's not conducive to weight loss, but I know it's just a break from the norm. Looking over my past posts I've always seen my biggest gains during this week.

I have to admit that I'm not feeling my best. I haven't drank much water, I've not been hungry much at all because I just keep munching and I've eaten too many sweets to where now I'm looking at cookies like "blech."

I'm also not proud to post such a large gain and to have to admit that once again I failed at meeting a weight loss goal (Hot 100 Challenge), but I know that I'm not giving up and I will see a loss next week. In fact, it's the failure of the Hot 100 Challenge that bothers me the most because I do know I'll get back on track with my eating.

I think I need to remind myself to never commit to time sensitive weight loss goals...because I don't make them. Who knows....

Anyway, the weight is posted and there's nothing to be done to change today's results. However, there is a full day ahead of me wherein I can get back with my program. It may happen today, or it may not happen until Monday when our life settles back into a normal routine.

I could go on, but I won't. Please just trust me that it's not over. The new Leah will be back from vacation soon enough.

Goal: Lose 20 pounds

Results: Lost 4

No Weeklong Christmas

2011-12-27T12:38:00.003-06:00

Hello! I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!! We did. :) Now I am recouping...more from the food than anything else.

Oh my! We've enjoyed special treats like pozole and tamales these past two-and-a-half days and my tummy is like "This is only good a few times a year." Oh and the sweets have been yummy too, but also more than I usually eat and not feeling so great after a few hours. :) Funny how eating healthier will do that to a body.

Saturday someone posted a quote by Bob Harper where he said, "You can enjoy Christmas Day, just don't make it Christmas Week." So, I'm here now having enjoyed a couple days of Christmas treats - both savory and sweet - and doing my best not to let it become Christmas week.

Have a good day!

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-24T05:00:00.000-06:00

"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord."

Have a safe and happy holiday everyone!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #12

2011-12-23T08:35:00.004-06:00

Update: I went to the doctor this morning and they had to weigh me...with my jeans and crocs on I weighed in at 178 . 0 . I gave an exclamation of joy at that site and then giggled at myself. :) (A) I'm under 180 at the doctor's too!!! (B) My scale is correct. Gloria!!

Today's Weigh: 177 . 5

Loss/Gain: - 3 lbs.

Merry [early] Christmas to me! :)

I actually had to go back and check last week's weigh in to see if I'd really lost three pounds this week. :) Actually, the scale has been below 180 for a couple days, so I was ~~hoping~~ planning on it being down today.

Funny thing is I have eaten a Christmas goodie every day this week, but I've been selective about what I've eaten; and I've made up for it with healthier choices and smaller portions throughout the rest of the day. I'm also continuing to get in plenty of water and sleep, along with exercise on some days.

And it works. :) Yes, I'm encouraged that something may have broken in my weight loss journey and now I can continue down the scale towards my goal. Finally.

Finally I'm getting it and making it work. Another reason to sing Gloria this Christmas season!

Happy Friday everyone!!

8 . 5 down

11 . 5 to go

Fun Christmas Cheer

2011-12-21T09:49:00.002-06:00

My mom emailed this link to me and I just had to share, because it's so fun!

After watching it I also thought it was a good thing to share on a weight loss blog, because I like how it showcases the talents of women of all shapes and sizes. Good for T-Mobile!!!

Winter Break

2011-12-20T09:43:00.004-06:00

Well, we have begun the winter break from school here and today I have to brag on my kids for a minute...

I was able to get my exercise done this morning without any fighting or interruptions from them. Yay!

I know it can be difficult to get exercise done when kids are smaller, Dad's at work and you're trying to finish up, but "Susie's got my dolly! " or "The movie's done, MOM!!!" or who knows what. Even older kids, like mine, can have their arguments that require parental intervention and that can wreck a workout. Many moms get up to exercise at wee hours of the morning to avoid this, but I'm not one of them.

So, today I'm grateful that my 13-year-old twin daughters and my 11-year-old son managed to get along and go about their business while Mommy kept to her exercise.

Thank you, guys!

I'm Becoming a Picky Eater

2011-12-19T08:48:00.003-06:00

Well, Monday is here and I'm happy to say that I didn't see a huge weekend gain on the scale this morning. As in, I ate dinner late last night and the scale was only up 0 . 5 a pound probably due to eating right before bed. Yay!

This is especially exciting because we had two major eating events since my weigh-in on Friday. Funny thing is I noticed something about my new self during both events.

Short Story:

I've become a picky eater, rating my food and deciding what I will and will not spend my calories on...without even really noticing I'm doing it. (Diane included some of this in her helpful hints blog post last week.)

Long Story:

Friday night was my husband's work Christmas dinner. The meal was a buffet including fried chicken mashed potatoes, sauteed fresh green beans, mashed potatoes and salad. I served myself a plate with a breast, plenty of salad and green beans and about 1/4 cup of mashed potatoes. Just enough potatoes for a taste. (Picky choice #1 - picking more veggies than potatoes!!)

After the meal I decided to enjoy one of the beautifully decorated cupcakes that were part of the centerpiece on our table. The first bite proved to be a letdown. After a second bite of the very dry cupcake I put it on my plate and quietly told my husband, "I'm not going to spend my calories on a dry cupcake." (Picky choice #2 - only eating treats I will really enjoy)

I did go home and enjoy one or two dark chocolate kisses after the party dinner - much more enjoyable than the dried out cupcake. :)

Saturday we went out with some friends to a farm with a wonderful buffet lunch. They serve a limited menu and bring the bowls of food out to the tables. Starters were ham biscuits in a bucket, of which I had a bite or two and then shared with my son and husband. (Picky choice #3 - not indulging on an appetizer when I know more food is coming.)

The meal included fried chicken, mashed potatoes, baked macaroni and cheese, corn, green beans, pork tenderloin and gravy. Again I served myself a breast, and a little of each thing with plenty of green beans. I ate until satisfied and enjoyed every bite. Then I decided to try a piece of their cheesecake for dessert. It was not a baked -In my opinion "real"- cheesecake, but a easy, no-bake cheesecake dessert. Again, I wasn't impressed and ended up eating only 2/3 of the small piece because I was getting full and didn't want to keep eating something I wasn't enjoying. (Picky choice #4 - not continuing to eat something just because I paid for it when it isn't all that great.)

Last, but not least, last night we had a late dinner at a local fast-food joint. Now, I must admit I ate fast food - actually I thought my chicken sandwich was grilled and it was fried...oops. But..the good thing was I served myself some sweet tea (for a treat I thought to myself) but after taking a few sips it was way too sweet for me. After thinking about it, wondering if I should just drink it instead of wasting it, I poured it out and served myself some diet soda instead. (Picky choice #5 - I again decided not to waste calories on something that wasn't sitting right with me..and not feel bad for wasting the food.)

Now, you made read this and think, "Good grief, Leah!! You ate all kinds of greasy foods!!!", but I am seeing much more than that. There is such a change in how I am around food that it gives me hope that I will reach my weight loss goals.

I am no longer eating food until I'm stuffed, nor am I feeling obligated to finish food just because I paid for it or because it's put in front of me. I'm learning to be picky in ways that allow me to enjoy treats and still help me stay on track with my health.

Have a great week everyone! I hope your last minute holiday preparations come together nicely. I'm off to get my house ready for a ladies' only ornament exchange party tonight. Whee!!!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #11

2011-12-16T07:05:00.002-06:00

Today's Weight: 180 . 5

Loss/Gain: - 0 . 5

Seeing as how TOM arrived a few days ago I'm content with this loss. It's a switch from the usual monthly gains I was expecting to interrupt these last few weeks of the Hot 100 challenge.

If it weren't for the Hot 100 challenge I'd be very proud of myself right now for showing a loss during my cycle, maintaining my 4-5 days a week of exercise and for not gaining weight during the holidays. I knew challenging myself to lose 20 pounds in three months was doable, but really out there for me. I know I still have two more weeks to work on losing before the end of the year, but I've pretty much given up on this challenge.

I'm not saying this to allow myself to go hog wild with eating the next two weeks, but to let you know that I have allowed myself to give it up mentally ~~and not live in a fear of rejection for my failure~~

Yes, I failed meeting the goal of this challenge. Yes, I'm ashamed of myself for that. But I am not going to dwell on it longer than necessary and, most importantly, I am not going to quit working on my weight loss journey.

Two weeks ago Lori commented to me, "Never feel like you can't get to goal. Always keep trying because the alternative is much, much worse." I have kept that in the back of my mind and it is why I will keep going. I didn't meet this challenge, but I have maintained my loss of 50 pounds and for that I'm happy.

So...I will go now. I have a house to clean, a work Christmas dinner to prepare for (where I will be wearing a skirt that is getting baggy on me), a few more presents to wrap while the kids are away at their last day of school before the Winter Break and I have to go keep my chin up.

I leave you with a famous quote from Miracle on 34th Street, "It's silly, it's silly, but I believe." I will lose this weight! :o)

Have a nice weekend everyone!

4 .5 down

15 . 5 to go

Fighting Christmas A.D.D.

2011-12-14T14:21:00.003-06:00

I have to admit something....I think I suffer from Christmas attention deficit disorder.

Yep, I find it hard to concentrate on the daily necessities of life when there is so much to be done for the approaching holidays. Oh my!!

During my morning devotions my mind wanders to Christmas party decor, gifts to buy. Then, after I've attempted to reign myself in and finish up my spiritual exercise, I find myself wanting to skip physical exercise and just get on with my day.

I mean, there are presents to wrap, ornaments to make, baking to be done! Right?!?!

Yes, but....

...there is also the need to maintain a healthy life through all the hustle and bustle.

So, to help myself stay focused on life I have adopted some of these practices lately:

I take time in my Bible reading to read parts of the Christmas story and really think about what it must've been like back then when our savior was born.
I pray for those that may be struggling during this holiday season - either with loss, financial struggles, with a family member away serving in the military, the list goes on.
I pray and thank God for the blessings he's bestowed upon my life.
I decide to go for my walk and put Christmas music on my iPod or listen to a Christmas story or Christmas themed Old Radio Show.

Did you catch that last one?

I decide.

I make a choice that I will do what needs to be done to stay sane during the holidays. And while it isn't always easy, I remind myself that everything will get done in good time and I'll be a happier wife, mother and friend if I stay focused and keep my daily healthy disciplines in place.

How about you? How do you manage all the ways you're pulled during the holidays? I'd love more ideas. :)

Go Visit Diane :)

2011-12-12T06:04:00.003-06:00

Good morning! I've a busy day ahead, so I thought I'd send you over to Diane to check out a giveaway she is doing this week on MizFit's My Trainer Fitness Packs. Click here to read all about it.

This could be a good stocking stuffer if you win!

Happy Monday!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #10

2011-12-09T07:05:00.003-06:00

Today's Weight: 181 . 0

Loss/Gain: - 2 . 0 lbs

While I'm glad to see the scale back down I am in a state of seriousness, because it's not like I haven't lost this two pounds a "million" times before.

In fact, as funny as the email I shared in yesterday's post was ... the truth of the matter is "faith without works is dead" (James 2:17) . I can pray, have prayed, for God to help me change, and I know he has. However, it's entirely up to me to make the right choices every. single. day.

There are just over two weeks until Christmas and I keep thinking, "All I want for Christmas is to be out of the 180's f.o.r.e.v.e.r. !!!" Now I just have to prove that I wanted it badly enough to do what it takes to see it happen.

Oh, and can I just say...it stinks having to worry about weight during December. This is my third December since I started my weight loss journey. In the past I've allowed myself to simply try and maintain through the month. Had I worked harder on my Hot 100 goals in the last two months I might feel better about not working as hard right now; however, it's like I've procrastinated and now that I've fallen behind I have to work while others "play". *sigh*

But...just so you don't think I'm wallowing in a state of holiday depression I will end by letting you know that everything else is going great in my life. I'm ...

Walking 3 miles at least 4-5 days a week
Drinking at least 64 oz. of water daily
Christmas cards are done and going in the mail this weekend
Most of my shopping is done
I have party plans that are falling into place
The bills are paid
We are all healthy and ...
I'm even enjoying a nice book with a Christmas theme running through it when I have a few minutes each day.

Now if I can just eat weight loss portions it will be a perfect holiday! :)

Oh, and because I committed to it...for the record:

4 down

16 to go

Have a nice weekend!

Thursday Funny - Prayer for 2012

2011-12-08T07:48:00.001-06:00

I received this in my email today and just had to share...too funny!

Dear God,

My prayer for 2012 is for a fat bank account & a thin body.

Please don't mix these up like you did last year.

AMEN!

This and That

2011-12-07T08:24:00.002-06:00

Well it's Wednesday and I haven't blogged yet this week. Busy. Busy. :) Here's a little bit of this and that's been going on in my life right now:

At a baby shower on Monday night I was going through the food line and a new friend of mine informed the lady handing out the corn tortillas that "Leah only wants one! I know.." I laughed because it's true. I'm always asking for a little scoop of the foods and she's catching on. :)
My son has been a little concerned with his pudgy belly. So we had a quick chat in the car, just he and I, about how (A) he doesn't need to compare himself with the other 6th grade boys (B) the doctor said he was fine at his physical, so he just needs to keep moving in life (C) this is why mommy limits desserts to one each evening and has mentioned that he can have a serving size of snacks crackers, etc. ...which lead to the next thing...
A day later my son is looking at a box of graham crackers and says, "Mom, they don't have the serving sizes on this box." I pointed it out to him and he said, okay. Yep, he's learning to read the labels and learning that he can be satisfied with ONE serving and not a mountain of crackers. When his sister asked how many grahams she could have yesterday he says, "Two big ones!" I'm so proud of him!
Yesterday I walked to a Leslie Sansone Christmas 3-Mile walk album and was reminded that I LOVE walking to a beat!! For the past month or so I've been walking to audiobooks, but there is something about a good brisk music beat that makes me happy. I 'm motivated by music.
Last night while watching the end of The Biggest Loser I had to think...I can't wait 'til I run like that. There's something so appealing to me about running. So, today I did 5 minute walk/jog intervals. Why put off 'til "I'm skinny" when I can at least attempt it today? It felt good!

So, it's been a good week so far! I hope you are having a good week yourselves. I need to shower now and get ready for a mid-morning coffee date with a friend. :)

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #9

2011-12-02T05:55:00.005-06:00

Today's Weight: 183 . 0

Loss/Gain: + 2 . 5 lbs

I have only a few things I'll say about this.

Yes, I over ate at Thanksgiving, but I haven't as much since I've been back.
I seriously am not sure what's going on with my body this week.
I'm embarrassed and did not want to post the weight.

I could've understood a maintain better than what my scale has been doing this week. It's weird. I could nit pick and think, "oh, it's this or that", but really it's just weird. One of those weeks where I don't understand what my body is doing.

I'll admit it's also moments like this that I wonder if I'll ever reach my goal. However, the one thing that has kept me going on this journey is that I refuse to give up this time. I'm determined to make it...so I will keep going.

On a happy note...last night my husband and I shared these words:

Me: I love that you love me even though I'm still big.

Husband: Funny you should say that....because...did you used to be a lot bigger?? (and he always loved me the same back then too) *big hug and kiss*

LOVE DAT MAN!

Have a nice weekend, everyone!

A Walk in the Country

2011-11-29T11:41:00.005-06:00

On Friday I posted about how I had a major holiday non-scale victory wherein I got up and went for a walk on Thanksgiving morning. Here's a little more on that story....

I was spurred on to consider walking while on vacation when I read a few weeks ago about a virtual 5 K Turkey Trot going on that day. People were going to commit to running (or walking) 5K/3.1 mi. Thanksgiving morning. I knew I was going to be visiting my grandmother and not going to be responsible for the entire Thanksgiving meal, so as I read that post I wondered why I didn't try to commit to walking the Turkey day 5K myself.

I knew why...

Because I knew me and me doesn't get up and walk while on vacation. Me likes to indulge on vacation in every sense of the word - eating treats, lazing about, etc. etc.

Well, apparently that is the old me, because the new me committed to walking on vacation by telling my friend Stephanie I would do it, packing walking clothes and my Garmin and then setting the alarm to get up to walk every morning.

And the new me did it.

It was kind of cold, but I was out for a walk by 7:15 am every day and enjoying the long quiet country roads that make up my grandparents "neighborhood".

Saturday, the 3rd morning, I didn't really want to get up, but I made myself. There was too much bothering me. Like I still needed a photo of the road and my son had told me the night before he'd get up and walk with me in the morning. :) Plus there was the fact that I knew I'd feel better after my morning walk. So, I got up and my son joined me - all bundled and full of chit chat.

While my eating wasn't all that great on our vacation the fact that I made good on my commitment to exercise was HUGE. It was a reminder that change IS possible. It may take a while and we may have so many failures along the way that we think the only option is to quit, but it's not.

It's often said, "baby steps" and it's so true, because eventually those baby steps add up and you find yourself doing things you never thought you could or would - like going for cold morning walks while on vacation. :)

Change in Progress

2011-11-29T09:44:00.001-06:00

Update: I think I've got it. :) Now to folding and getting my walk done while the rain has subsided.

I'm in the middle of "decorating" my blog while getting laundry done today, so please bear with me. Hopefully I'll get it together before the day is through...or at least by December 1st.

Vacation is Good

2011-11-27T16:28:00.003-06:00

I don't normally post on Sundays because it's my day of rest and I'm enjoying being home between church services and relaxing. However, I've done lots of relaxing the past four days and I had to pop on here to say that I took a walk this afternoon and I'm feeling very renewed and refreshed and ready to keep working on my weight loss - EVEN IF IT IS THE HOLIDAYS. :)

I'll write more tomorrow, but just had to share a bit today. :)

Thankful Friday & NSV

2011-11-25T16:31:00.005-06:00

I've got a few minutes to be online and decided to check in and finish up my week of thankfulness by say how grateful I am for friends who have been such a great support and encouragement in my weight loss journey.

My journey to become healthier has turned into something much more than I ever expected. Through the wisdom of friends in blog land and the regular phone calls and texts of a close personal friend I've been able to continue on this journey and not give up on myself.

It's that kind of support that lead me to another step towards my healthier new self....

...I got up and went for a walk Thanksgiving morning. I also went again this morning before we went on an outing with the family.

That's my non-scale victory, because I never thought I'd see the day I'd go for a walk on a holiday. :)

God is good and so are the friends he's blessed my life with.

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #8

2011-11-23T07:11:00.002-06:00

Today's Weight: 180 . 5

Loss/Gain: - 1 .5

I'm doing my Hot 100 update early as I will be basically unplugging for the rest of this Thanksgiving week/holiday weekend.

Today I'm thankful for my health and for not giving up on my health. I'm thankful that somewhere deep inside of me is a spark that makes me continue fighting to win this weight battle, even if it takes a lifetime.

5 . 5 down

14 . 5 to go

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!!

Thankful Tuesday

2011-11-22T09:46:00.002-06:00

Today as I was praying I really thought about my family and how blessed I am by all the familial links in my life. So, in no particular order, I'm thankful for:

My husband for his faithfulness to me in marriage, to provide for our family and for being a part of our children's lives. Even when his job or college left him with little extra time he has always made time to play with the kids or listen to me talk.
My children who each are turning into their own people. There's my kind-hearted artist girl, my crafty helper-leader girl and a boy with a great imagination. While each day has it's ups and downs there are plenty of good times where these kids bring us great joy.
My parents and brother (my only sibling) who are still in touch with each other though we are in three different states. It's a blessing to be a part of a family that loves each other and has not let differences break us apart. To God be the glory!
My sister-in-law, who opened her heart to us from the day she got serious with my brother, and who has been quite the trooper and stood by him through a bout with cancer last year. She's one tough cookie and I know God brought her into our lives for a reason.
My in-laws on my husband's side. I don't think a blonde, blue-eyed girl was who they imagined their Mexican son/brother marrying some day, but I never would've known it by how they acted. From day one they were polite and caring and have loved me for who I am over these 16 years of marriage. My mother-in-law has also been very willing to teach me to make mexican food and share her tips, instead of harboring them as her own special treats to make when she's visiting.

And last, but most certainly not least...

I'm so thankful for my salvation. The fact that Jesus would give his life for me, a sinner who is so full of mistakes, amazes me. That He would go even further to bless my life with the above is an added bonus. I don't regret one moment I have lived as a Christian, and will never tire of thanking Him for not giving up on me.

Thankful Monday

2011-11-21T12:44:00.003-06:00

I woke up today feeling much better than I did a week ago. So, as I was setting out for my walk (and so very grateful to be walking again) I decided I would do a week of posts of things I'm thankful for.

Yes, I know, it's not an uncommon theme with this week being the week of our Thanksgiving Day holiday, but I also know that it's common to sit and feel sorry for ourselves when we really have so much to be thankful for. Case in point, I told my pastor about a positive development in my life last night and his reply was, "Oh good! It's good to hear the positive stuff going on too!"

Yep, it's definitely easier to let out the negative stuff and not remember to come back and share the good going on. So, here's some good things I'm grateful for today:

My cold is going away and I am not having coughing fits any more.
PMS is over and for another month the hormonal roller coaster has settled back into normalcy. :)
No one in my family caught my cold.
My children get up and get ready for school without complaining.
My husband was willing to sit and talk with me alone for two hours Friday night about life; where we've been, where we're going and he was patient with me when I shared some struggles and thoughts.

I'll stop at that for today. What are you thankful for? I'd love to hear!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #7

2011-11-18T05:55:00.006-06:00

Today's Weight: 182 . 0

Loss/Gain: +1 . 0

It figures. I've been sick this week and then TOM arrived two days ago. So, only one light walk has happened while both the sicky and munchy monsters have been visiting my house/life.

I'm feeling better in my head and now just praying for the coughing to stop. My hope is next week will be so much better than this.

It's weeks like this that make me realize how much I have to be grateful for. I only get sick like this about once or twice a year, same for my family, but I know there are people dealing with sickness year round.

So, while I'm vexed that this less hectic week turned into a sicky, snacky week I am also grateful for general good health. My cold will pass, so will my monthly, and I will be back to normal soon enough. It's a lifelong journey and I can't think this one week will ruin everything.

For the record...

4 down

16 to go

Have a good weekend everyone!

A Little Fuzzy

2011-11-16T08:37:00.002-06:00

First off, thank you for the well wishes!

I'm still feeling a little fuzzy in the head, but better than the last two days. Since I felt a little better I went for a walk this morning. I kept it slow and short.

I'm keeping hydrated and drugged to help clear congestion and break up mucous. I hate coughing and am doing my best to keep this cold from getting any worse. So, no big plans...just trying to get better. :)

Rest & Fluids

2011-11-14T17:26:00.002-06:00

I've felt like this most of today...

Friday my throat was sore and it has progressed until today is the worst I've felt so far. I thought rest over the weekend would help, and maybe it did, but I've been wishing I could sleep all day today.

Itchy eyes, sore throat, runny nose...basic cold symptoms. So it's rest and fluids for me (though I keep snacking too...darn it. That's stopping tonight.)

I am grateful for one thing...I'm feeling crappy the week between our conference and the week of Thanksgiving. I don't have too much extra going on this week, so I can sneak in naps and hopefully get over this cold quickly.

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #6

2011-11-12T08:42:00.004-06:00

Friday's Weight: 181 . 0

Loss/Gain: - 1 . 0 lb

I'm very pleased with this loss and here's why.

Short Story:
I've had a week that was crazy busy from sun up to sun down. I've literally had about 30 minutes a day to sit and just relax. While this schedule did not allow for any formal exercise it did end up being one of my best eating weeks ever full of all kinds of non-scale victories.

Long Story:
If you look at my Daily Mile widget you'll see my last workout was a week ago and this is true. My busy week started with laundry and house cleaning on Saturday to prepare for company coming for a week long stay on Monday.

Then this past week was a Bible Conference at our church wherein I helped in the kitchen preparing, serving and cleaning up refreshments for a break in the morning seminars. After that I would go home pick up the house, shower, get kids from school, iron clothes for evening services, direct the flow of showers and getting ready for those services and then we'd be out the door for evening services.

Somewhere in between that I made time to work on two poster projects for our church, have lunch with my husband one day and our guests another and check my emails. :)

It was crazy.

At the same time it was the kind of crazy that only happens a few times a year and is wonderful to be a part of. Especially when I've had successes, otherwise known as non-scale victories, in my eating like this:

Our refreshments for the break were juice, coffee, fruit and donuts. I only had 1/2 a donut on the last morning. I took my 32 oz. water bottle and drank that every morning and brought my own snacks consisting of fruit and cheese sticks or a yogurt.

When I went to Olive Garden for lunch one day I did not eat any breadsticks - for the 1st time in my life!!! I only had two servings of salad and one bowl of pasta fagioli soup.
When my friends ordered seconds of soup I kind of wanted to, but realized it was only for one of two reasons (1) peer pressure "they are, so why not" and (2) "I don't want to make them feel bad. They are larger than me and might feel bad for eating more when I'm not." The latter thought was due to one of them confiding in me she is working on losing weight. But then I realized this is about MY journey and I needed to do what was best for me. I was satisfied and needed to stop. And I did. (HUGE victory for me!!!)

I went to lunch with my husband some delicious meditteranean food and again only ate until satisfied.

In fact, this whole week I can honestly say that I ate only until satisfied every. single. day. I actually had to eat dinner at 9:30 the night before my weigh-in, so I know the scale was up a little due to that, because I have hovered between 180 - 181 all week.

Oh, I also have to add that I was able to wear a blouse this week that hasn't fit me since I bought it a year ago, and an Indian outfit I wore a year-and-a-half ago has gotten big on me and I was able to pinch the sides in an inch on either side of the top to show a friend how loose it was.

When I showed my friend that she replied, "I've been meaning to tell you that whatever you are doing is working...you're losing weight and I can tell!!"

So, while my weigh-in shows only a pound loss for the last two weeks I have to say the victories in my life with regards to weight and eating have been worth much, much more than that.

It's why I'm proud to say for the record...

5 pounds down

15 to go

Have a great weekend and I will check back in next week!

Veterans Day

2011-11-11T15:08:00.003-06:00

I will be posting my weight update tomorrow. Today I'd like to simply say thank you to our veterans.

Card design and poetry is my own work.

All pieces of art used in the creation of this card are from "DigiDiva" at Gotta Pixel.

Buffet NSV x 2

2011-11-07T12:09:00.003-06:00

Hello! I have a very busy week ahead, but wanted to pop in to share a wonderful non-scale victory involving a buffet dinner.

The other day we went to Golden Corral for dinner to break a time of fasting. Haven not eaten in a long time left me very hungry, but I told myself I didn't want to overeat and be stuffed to the point of sickness...easily done when breaking a fast.

And I didn't.

I enjoyed a full meal and was full, but I was not stuffed. I didn't feel sick, or have any regrets that I ate too much.

On top of that, I did not eat anything else the rest of the evening.

I knew I would be full until bedtime and told myself I needed to try and not snack just because I was eating again. At one point I started to reach for a Reese's PB Cup (my FAVORITE), but I stopped in in my mind reminded myself that I had dessert at Golden Corral and I didn't need more.

THIS IS HUGE FOR ME!!!

So, I start the week off with that bright thought. I'm also glad to report that while the scale isn't down at that "fun" number I saw Friday morning after fasting, it is lower than my last weigh-in.

Hip, hip, hooray! Here's to a great week and breakthroughs in overeating!!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #5

2011-11-04T15:42:00.004-05:00

Today's Weight: -----

Loss/Gain: ----

Sorry for the delay in a Friday weigh-in post today, but it's been a busy day. Also, I have slightly different post today. I will not be posting my weight today.

Yesterday I joined with some others in a personal 24-hour time of fasting. I didn't have a say so in the scheduling so doing it a day before weigh-in was out of my control. It sure did mess with the scale. :) In a fun-to-see-something-so-low way, but not in an honest-weight-for-the-week way.

So, I've decided not to post my weight today. It should even back out by next week and maybe I'll even see something close to that number by then...for real. :)

Unfortunately this also messes with my Hot 100 update, but you'll have to bear with me for now. :)

Have a great weekend!

A Ban

2011-11-02T14:30:00.003-05:00

I think I'm going to have to ban myself...from candy. argh. *shaking head* I haven't eaten as much candy as the old Leah would've, but I've eaten more than a Hot 100 girl should be.

The week's not over and I'm not letting it ruin my days, but I had to be honest with everyone. Today I've only had three bites of pumpkin cake, so that's good.

Time to go finish up a few things this afternoon before I start dinner. I hope you're all doing good during this candy-infested week.

Is It The Jeans?

2011-10-31T14:38:00.002-05:00

So, Saturday night I was at a church function in some jeans, a "stylish" t-shirt and cute cardigan from Target with some decorative trim. Towards the end of the evening a girl started gushing about how good I was looking. She was so sweet and asked if I've lost weight since I moved here.

"Well, let me tell you....." I said...

Just kidding.

I told her I've only lost a few pound since moving here, but I've lost 49 pounds over the last 2 - 2 . 5 years.

One girl said she would like to see a before picture because she couldn't imagine me at 231 pounds. The rest ooh'd and ah'd and I felt great.

What felt even better was knowing that I'm really learning to get control over my eating, finding my niche in exercise and the result is seeing the scale move downwards again.

I can't imagine the 3.5 pound loss I saw last week made a big difference... so it must've been my new cutie jeans from Kohls... LOL

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #4

2011-10-28T06:00:00.004-05:00

Today's weight: 182 . 0

Loss/Gain: - 3 . 5 lbs

I haven't seen this number on the scale since before we moved, so I'm just a little excited about it. :)

This week has been a trial of sorts for me. As I mentioned earlier in the week I've changed my workouts to walking instead of more intense workouts at the gym - spin class/elliptical etc. I know I am capable of doing more intense exercise, but it seems to mess with me with regards to my body retaining water, gaining muscle and so not seeing weight loss and I think I'm even a little more hungry due to the exertion.

Don't get me wrong, I know I feel great when I workout hard and see the toning in my body. I also know plenty of people lose weight while doing more intense exercise, but I want to see that scale go down and it's been vexing that it hasn't moved. So, I decided to cut back a little on the intensity of exercise and focus more on my food.

One week of good loss isn't proof that doing this is necessarily better, but for now it's good for me. I'm telling you...my stress level has been way down since I'm not worried about water retention and whether or not to take step class on Thursday because I'll retain water and the scale won't be down on Friday, yada yada. And I think I'm noticing that it's a little easier to not overeat because I'm not as hungry throughout the day.

This is definitely a trial period for me and if I can see weight loss while sticking with walking, then that's what I'll continue to do. I think I might add something for my upper body strength, like some toning with hand weights and maybe planks for core strength.

I also still want to run someday and do definitely see myself getting more into that, but I'm thinking it might be better to work on being a runner after I've lost a little more weight. We'll see ...

In the meantime, I've had a great week, possibly the best week in my healthiness journey since we moved, and I happily share with you my Hot 100 Update for this week:

4 . 5 down

15 . 5 to go

Have a great weekend and please be safe if you're taking part in Halloween activities this weekend!

Check Our Her Homemade Chicken Broth

2011-10-26T12:07:00.003-05:00

I grew up in a home where whole chickens were cooked often for their meat. I'm pretty sure it's because it was cheaper. It also gives a great smell to the house, and so I love to cook a whole chicken once in a while for that very reason.

I bring that up because today Diane over at Fit to the Finish shared how she makes homemade chicken broth. Click here to read it and try it yourself sometime. You won't regret it and your family will love the way the house smells!!

Note: My only addition is to add some onions and celery to the pot while simmering. Yum!!

I'm Walking

2011-10-25T14:37:00.003-05:00

Someone asked at the close of a post earlier this week, "What will you do to be good to yourself this week?" My instant reply was I will do what is best for me on my weight loss journey and not worry about pleasing others with how I exercise.

I say that because of late I've been walking daily for exercise. I feel that I need to focus on the eating and not stressing so much about pushing myself with regards to exercise.

I'm loving this, especially with regards to the time saved in travel to and from the gym (20 mins minimum each way). Yes, I know I am capable of more, so if time allows I'll take a class here and there. I also want to continue in my running aspirations, so I will run when I feel like it. My tentative long term plan is to definitely get back into running as my weight lowers.

In the meantime, we are having some absolutely beautiful fall weather and I'm loving my beautiful morning walks. Have a great day!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #3

2011-10-21T07:51:00.005-05:00

Today's Weight: 185 . 5

Loss/Gain: 0

Yes, zero, zip, zilch.

Considering that a week ago I wanted to quit this weight loss thing entirely, was sick of being a person who has to consider what she eats and how much she exercises and was basically only hanging on by a thread of desire somewhere deep within to press forward no matter what...I'm okay with this maintain.

It doesn't help my Hot 100 Challenge, except that I'm not back where I started. But I've really been working through some non-weight related issues lately and it stresses me out at times. I can see how it is affecting my weight loss journey and I'm working things out.

In the meantime, I'm plugging on ahead. I keep posting my exercise as I complete it and I've begun using My Fitness Pal online to track my food since I managed to kill my iPod touch earlier this week (yea, I'll have to journal about that later...it's funny in a small way...) .

Just please know I haven't given up. TOM has come and I think PMS is tapering off now because I'm eating better and not feeling quite as snacky as earlier in the week/end of last week.

In the meantime, for the record...

1 . 0 pound down

19 . 0 pounds to go

In My Spare Time

2011-10-20T20:12:00.007-05:00

Just in case you ever wonder what I do when I'm not being a wife, mother, blogger, exerciser...

Here's a few things I like to do in my spare time:

Make felt ornament crafts - usually around the holidays. I made this pumpkin one for a friend of mine that does not live in the south. I've seen that phrase and thought it'd be a cute "touch of the south" gift for her. All done by hand.

Try new recipes. Like Lori's pumpkin custard oats, which were delicious..though I had to add more splenda to sweeten it up for me.

Create digital scrapped creations like this cutie owl card I made today for fun...and because I have recently purchased two adorable owls for my house and was in the mood to be creative.

Oh, and shop, of course, especially when I have gift cards from my birthday (in July) like the one I was able to use today at Pier 1 to buy this adorable little owl. We've named her "Miss Picket" since her apron (I'm also in love with aprons) looks a little like a picket fence

So, that's my interesting post for today, which means things are going pretty good and I've nothing else to report. I'm exercising, eating better and hoping for good things to continue on the scale.

Until tomorrow...

I Caught Myself

2011-10-17T20:30:00.002-05:00

Today I had a physical exam. As the nurse was doing the pre-exam routine she asked me to step on the scale. I removed my shoes, stepped up there and automatically began to say....

"You can move the big one to the 200."

I no sooner thought this, and began to say it, when I caught myself. I don't weigh 200 anything and I haven't in over a year.

Isn't that interesting? My instinct was to think I was large, but then I realized I'm not that big anymore.

It was a very small, yet great big wonderful feeling. Somehow I felt thin, or thinner at least. Because I wasn't even close to 200.

Even better was seeing that my weight at the doctor's office in the middle of the afternoon was a clean 186 . 0 lbs. I seriously expected it to be a lot more than my home scale and it wasn't at all. whew!

Anyway, I thought that was an interesting reaction to the scale after all this time. G'nite!

My Favorite Breast Cancer Survivor

2011-10-15T17:53:00.013-05:00

Most of you know October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. In times past I've donated to co-workers doing the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure, or clicked on a blog button like Lori has to support free mammograms, but otherwise I've never given it much thought.

Until last year.

Last year my mother went through her own fight with breast cancer and I was suddenly faced with the realities of what a diagnosis like that can do to a person and family.

Thankfully, my mother is now a breast cancer survivor and still with us today. I've asked her to share a few words with you about her story. I'm very proud of how she fought and thankful to the Lord that she made it through safe and sound.

How to start? I must start out expressing my gratefulness to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for His love and faithfulness to keep His promises.

I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer in April of 2010. This came as quite a shock as it must have to many others with the same diagnosis. I had some pain in my breast since Sept. of '09. The pain had gone away and there no lump that I could find. But, I did have a "dimple" on the bottom left side.

I had never heard of a dimple being a sign of cancer. I pretty much ignored it until it was time for me to go for a physical and my doctor saw the dimple and ordered a mammogram. What had hindered me from going in sooner was the lack of insurance and my husband had lost his job in '08 and was now working 30 hrs. a week at less than half his former wages. I had applied to a local place who provide help to low income but this was a long time coming. I finally got help with Medicaid a month or so before I was diagnosed.

By May 20th I was in surgery having a mastectomy on one side. Chemo started on June 21 and radiation on Nov. 30. Wow! What a wild ride. I had so many family and friends in support of me during this time it blew me away. Every person I ran into during all the doctor visits, chemo, nurses, receptionists and such were the kindest people at all times. I believe God put them there for me. Since I had so much down time I thought I would take this time to read the Bible more and pray. God was there for me as He is for all. I know that Jesus was there for me through all the fear, sadness and the "poor me's". He has been my Rock and Strength.

My husband was everything I'd hope he would be during a crisis! He picked up all the slack while keeping up at his job. He cooked, cleaned and bought the groceries. We were able to schedule most of the doctor visits so he could be there with me. We have been married 37 years and our marriage has been tested in all the vows now!

On Feb. 1, 2011 I was announced as "Cancer Free!" I give God all the praise and glory for I know His hand guided us all through this trial of life.

Don't be afraid of cancer. Trust in Jesus and He will be there for you. In the end, we win!

Kathy Garfield, October 8, 2011

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #2

2011-10-14T08:14:00.003-05:00

Today's Weight: 185 . 5

Loss/Gain: + 1 . 5

All I can say is that letting myself go for an evening and one day was not conducive to staying on track the rest of the week. *sigh* Last Friday night I went out for a girls night and ate too much dessert. Then Saturday we went to a local pizza parlor to watch the OU vs TX game (Boomer Sooner!!) and though my husband shared some antipasto salad with me I also ate pizza, and crusts, and more crusts and more pizza.

Unfortunately, I ~~planned~~ thought I would get back on track the next day and chalk it up to one calorie-heavy 24 hours, but that didn't happen.

Jodie asked earlier this week why we fail after success and I told her for me it's over confidence in my abilities to stick with my plan. I should add that I think I have weight loss ADD - I don't stay focused for long periods of time.

This is why I put myself in this challenge for the end of the year...to make myself stay focused for more than a day on my weight loss. I've now had one good week and one bad week...time to realize I really have to focus every meal. every day.

Lori also mentioned that losing the weight is only 1/4 of the battle - Oh my!! I'm in so much trouble if that's the case... Just kidding, Lori...kind of. I think for me, it will be half, because I'm seeing what it requires to lose the weight and keeping it off will require continuing the healthy lifestyle. I seem to be able to maintain just fine this year though. *sigh*

I did exercise 3 days and am on my way to the gym this morning for the 4th this week, all 50-60 minutes of cardio, so that is good.

But needless to say, my challenge update isn't positive this week:

1 pound down

19 pounds to go

11 weeks left...argh...

No posting because...

2011-10-13T18:24:00.002-05:00

...well I realized later today why I haven't blogged about anything since Tuesday (like it's really been that long, huh - LOL) and it's because....

I've been working on designing our Christmas card. I love to do digital scrapbooking and realized I needed to get our card together.

I'd love to show you what I've come up with, because my 4th design (after making 5) is the one I think we've decided on....BUT...you'll have to wait until Christmastime. :) It's nothing hugely spectacular, but I like it a lot and I'm excited!

Now I am going to go work on a shadow box/board for a wedding at our church this Sunday. It's to welcome the guests and such - this is paper scrapping style. Whee!!

Nothin New

2011-10-13T11:02:00.002-05:00

I'm alive, but there's really nothing new to report. :)

Trouble Commenting?

2011-10-11T14:46:00.002-05:00

Does anyone have trouble commenting on my blog? I guess I might not know if you can't....I just can't seem to reply to comments on my own blog and am curious how to fix it. Any ideas?

Today is going fine. I had major hair drama (highlights that looked more like bad bleach job ALL OVER) , but the nice people at Ulta fixed it at no charge (by adding in nice low lights) and so I'm very pleased with that. Now I can go on with my day in peace.... Thank you, Ulta!!

Oh, and spin class kicked my butt again today. Shortly after starting class I thought, "WHY DO I DO THIS?????" It's hard. I do my best, and saw it already being better than the first class, and just plug my way through it. She changes things up enough that the time does eventually pass. It's definitely the hardest thing I do in the week of workouts.

Anyway...back to my original question. If you have any ideas how to fix the commenting situation I'd appreciate it. I've had a friend tell me she can't comment on my blog either, so it's not just me.

Thanks!!

Big Weekend

2011-10-10T14:21:00.003-05:00

As I told my friend yesterday in a text....

If I had Twitter I'd have to tweet "Too much food this weekend. Time to get back on track tomorrow!!"

How to know you've eaten too much:

Rarely felt hungry all weekend, after I started with salad and pizza for lunch on Saturday.
Didn't track food at all. Naughty. Naughty.
And finally this morning I wasn't even hungry for breakfast.

I had to make myself eat a Zone bar for breakfast just to make sure I ate something before working out, but I really didn't feel hungry until after the workout.

However, today has been good so far, so yay for that! :)

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #1

2011-10-07T09:49:00.004-05:00

Today's Weight: 184 . 0

Loss/Gain: - 2 . 5 lbs.

Hot 100 Challenge Update:

2 .5 lbs down ...... 17 . 5 to go :)

Okay...insert *sheepish grin* here. I guess the scale evened out after all.

Though I have to say that my cynical mind, and a bit of seeing how my body works, thinks that it would've been up a little had I done the step class yesterday instead of a good, long walk. I still think this is due to the muscles retaining water when I do heavier exercise.

But...I am very happy with this loss. It's a good start to my end-of-the-year challenge and I know I worked hard for it.

Last night I took the kids for Subway and opted for a salad with dressing on the side (I used half the dressing). It was another moment of "Look ma! I'm doing this!" as I was very content with my meal and even more that it helped me stay within my calorie budget after having a large lunch.

This morning I met a friend to do walk/jog intervals at a nearby neighborhood walking path. She said it's about 2 . 5 miles around, and I would've double checked but my garmin died about 2 minutes into it. *sigh*

Then I had to use the restroom from, oh..pretty much the beginning.

Folks, there is nothing that will ruin a workout more for me than the urge to pee. I will stop what I'm doing and go to the bathroom without giving another thought to time records, losing my place on a machine at the gym etc.. Unfortunately that wasn't an option today.

So, needless to say having the urge to pee every time we'd run ruined the entire experience for me. Yes, seriously. I was so mad.

However, when we finished and she told me that we completed it in approximately 34 minutes...I was happy. While the last few running intervals were hard for me (and I had to pee worse than when we started, like seriously thought Depends might be my best option when running) I was pleased to hear her say, "That's a pretty good time. My fastest is doing that in 32 minutes."

And I wasn't exhausted when it was over.

Anyway, I'm rambling now, so I should stop. I'm happy with the loss. I'm happy that I did the running. I'm happy that I have a toilet.. LOL and I'm happy that when I stopped at Starbucks on the way home to get some coffee I had this little conversation with myself:

"- oooh...a pumpkin something sounds good, or even a non-fat, sugar-free latte.

- No, I don't really want that.

- We used to feel like we earned something special after a hard workout, or just on a bright sunny day like today when the birds are singing and it's brisk and cool out.

- There might be cake at the birthday party tonight, or higher cal foods...so I don't need anything "special" right now. Plus, we're going to be eating out tomorrow while watching the game. and....I don't really want it...just some food, which I can have at home.

- okay. You're right. ...we don't really want it do we? Weird, but cool! "

And that is how I'm going to get these 20 pounds off. Have a great weekend!!

Getting It Off My Chest

2011-10-06T09:00:00.003-05:00

Yesterday morning I got up and weighed myself like I do every morning. The scale hadn't budged hardly any since Friday, and it was very upsetting to me.

My thoughts were this:

"I've stayed within my calorie budget every day, worked myself so hard that my legs are still aching, haven't had hardly any time to just rest and read (due to busy schedule and fitting in trips to the gym daily) and for that?!?! I'm never going to lose 20 pounds if this is how my body is going to react to heavy workouts and eating well."

Yes, I know that last part doesn't make a lick of sense, but it's how I felt. I proceeded to go ahead and indulge throughout the day adding probably an extra 150-250 extra calories to my day.

I know this is only the first week.

I know I have to keep going.

I also know that when my legs are hurting like that and I'm drinking at least 96 oz. of water a day it's vexing to not see miracles on the scale.

I also know the scale is only a number, not a complete depiction of how well my body is feeling these days.

But I also know I was vexed...and while I was nervous to post this because people who know me personally will think I over challenged myself on the Hot 100 or think I'm just the same old emotional Leah, I decided I had to post it.

Because I had a crappy day.

The silver lining on my day consists of the following threaded together:

I was asleep by 10:15 pm, which lead to a good nights rest.
I did not eat an extra 1,000 calories as I could have.
I still did a 30 minute workout on the arc though I was sore and vexed (is that where "sorely vexed" comes from ??)

Anyway...there it is folks. It's off my chest and I'm going to choose to leave it here. On the blog. And no longer heavy upon my heart. And for those of you rolling your eyes because it hasn't even been a week...well...please stop.

I keep remembering Galations 6:9

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."

Thanks for listening.

Awesome Weekend

2011-10-04T07:18:00.004-05:00

I had an awesome weekend!! (Monday was a very full laundry day w/a baby shower etc., so I'm barely getting a chance to blog about it today.) Besides the fact that I tracked all my eats and stayed within my calorie budget (a small miracle for me) it was full of good choices and strong decisions like these...

When the family was having this late Saturday night:

I was eating this:

A whole wheat waffle with a kids size Chobani greek yogurt on top. (Thanks to Jillian Michaels for that food combination idea.)

I did NOT eat even ONE, NOT ONE french fry. This is huge for me!!

Then on Sunday we had company for lunch and my husband grilled some marinated beef loins and vegetable kabobs.

While I had also prepared some twice baked potatoes with all the yummy goodness of sour cream, cheese and ranch inside...I chose to only eat about two cups of the vegetables and the meat, which I measured on my kitchen scale to make sure I only ate one serving. No potatoes made it on my plate. (yes, I tasted a small bite to make sure they were okay, but that was it. - and yes I could've made them healthier, but I didn't want to for everyone else.)

That's not all...

After church Sunday evening we went to a fast food joint called Cookout which is known for lots of fried stuff and yummy shakes of many flavors. I usually get my food and then steal bites of my son's shake.

But instead I chose to have their grilled chicken sandwich with no dressing/sauces and a 1/4 - 1/2 c. serving of cole slaw which seemed to be prepared in vinegar, because there was no white sauce on it resembling mayo.

Again, I did not take one bite of anything fried off my kids' plates, nor did I have even one bite of my son's shake. I even made myself fill my medium-sized soda cup with water and drank that before having any soda.

What's crazy to me is that this hasn't been all that hard. The choices feel better and I know it's going to help me in the long run. It is a tad nerve wracking, like "Will I be able to stick with this??", but I know God is helping me and with His help and just taking it a day at a time I think I'll finally see reaching my goal weight become a reality.

Finally! :)

Weigh-In ... Water & Hot 100 v.2011

2011-09-30T08:02:00.006-05:00

Today's Weight: 186 . 5

Loss/Gain: - 1 . 5 lbs

This was a good week food wise. I've tracked my food at least five days this week and even stayed pretty well within my calorie budget ( a slight miracle for me).

However, I am going to say that I saw this weight coming and it's something I'm determined to figure out. I've been hovering around 185/184 . 5 the past couple of days, then I take my step class - a.k.a. heavy exercise - yesterday and my scale is up.

This happens to me a lot and it vexes me. My only answer is...water.

Which is funny because both Stephanie and MizFit have written about hydration in the past week. It must be a sign, especially because I need that scale to reflect the good eating I've been doing. Not that losing a pound and a half isn't good, but it ~~needs to be~~ can be better.

Why?

Because it's that time of year again...time for the Hot 100 Challenge and this year I'm going to challenge myself more than I ever did in the last two years.

For those that are new to my blog this year, in 2009 and 2010 Steve over at Log My Loss has sponsored a challenge to finish out the last 100 days of the year with a bang. He has inspired us to set goals that will help us stick with our healthiness journeys through the holidays and finish the year strong. I've taken part in these challenges every year so far.

This year it's taken on a do-it-yourself theme (which really isn't it always something we have to do ourselves?? but I digress...) which simply means that he is not going to coordinate it all, set rules, etc. and give out prizes like in the past. For me, it only means I STILL GET TO DO IT!!! :) Yay!!!

The only rule of this challenge is to do it. Whatever you challenge yourself to do to finish out this year strong do it and don't give up.

So I am. And I'm going to finish stronger than I have been all year.

My goal for this Hot 100 Challenge is...

Lose 20 pounds.

Today's weight 186 . 5

Goal for Hot 100 166 . 5

Did you just look at my weight for the past year on the side bar? I knew you would, and I would too if I was you. I would even doubt me if I was you. It's okay, because I know my track record isn't the best. However, I also know what I've been going through this past couple of weeks and if you remember what I wrote yesterday I know that I am capable of more.

So, I am challenging myself in a way I have always had the greatest fear of challenging myself...by setting a weight goal.

I'm not even going to belabor you with little bullets of how I'm going to reach that 20 pounds lost, because I know that right now I don't need to pat myself on the back each week for little achievements if I'm not attaining the main goal. The little achievements are necessary to the bigger picture, but they are not the focus here...even if they always makes me feel better ~~give me excuses to not improve~~.

So, while my stomach has just become a bundle of nerves for putting this goal out in public (even though I've been thinking on it, planning and praying before this challenge came up) and my fingers are getting shaky as I type.... I wobbly stand before you and make it public.

I will focus and lose ~~as close to~~ 20 pounds by January 30 - exactly three months from today.

Pray for me.

Wish me luck.

Cross fingers and toes.

Send overcoming, fearless thoughts my way

but above all...

Thanks for sticking with me this far.

I. will. not. give. up.

Note: The Hot 100 Challenge is open to anyone. So, if you care to join me feel free to copy the badge and post your own Hot 100 Goal(s) on your blog. Comment here and I'll follow along with you. You can let Steve know you're joining in as well if you'd like. Here are samples of my past goals: 2009 & 2010

Capable of More

2011-09-29T10:00:00.003-05:00

adjective

having power and ability; efficient; competent: a capable instructor.

Today I took my second step class and I realized again that I am capable of more than I think. I've taken step classes on and off over the last 15 years and always enjoyed the variety of moves and the upbeat tempo. I used to only use the actual step and then when I did add one riser I would barely keep up.

Both times I've taken the class in the last 10 days I've put one riser under the step and I've still been able to add a bounce to my moves and pump it up when instructed to do so. Woo Hoo!!!

Last week my husband went to the gym with me and was running on a treadmill while I was in the class. He could see me through the half-opened vertical blinds and said he noticed how well I kept up with the class.

GO ME!!!

Actually, what's even more exciting is this:

The past two-and-a-half years of exercise have put me in better shape and it's showing in the class.
I'm one of the heavier ladies in the class, but I'm keeping up with thin girls - due to #1.
While it gets tough at times I'm able to keep up and I'm not dying when it's over.

Yep, just when I thought I could settle for nice little walks around my neighborhood I am realizing that I am capable of much more.

This is not to put down walking one bit, please understand that if you've never visited my blog before, and one of my life goals will always be to be physically able to take daily walks when I'm old and gray.

However, this 35-year-old lady is capable of more than that right now. The past couple years of investing my time into learning about healthier living has brought me to a point where I'm both capable and competent enough to do more than I have been. Doing well in the step class reminded me of that.

Oh, and you know what this means, right? This means I have no excuse not to get the rest of my weight off. So, I'm going to. Stay tuned...

24-Hour Getaway

2011-09-28T09:12:00.006-05:00

A more personal post with some weight-related items sprinkled in....

Last Friday my husband took me out of town for a little 24-hour-getaway to celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary. The kids stayed home with a sitter for the night. We enjoyed some shopping Friday afternoon including new running shoes for him and pants for me from Kohls (I LOVE KOHLS). They were a more snug size 16 than last spring, but they still fit and that was wonderful for me.

We stopped for a lunch of sushi and a japanese flavored meat and rice tray. Then we checked into our hotel and hung out until it was time to get ready for dinner.

For dinner he surprised me with reservations to The Melting Pot. I've wanted to try this place for years. You definitely pay for the experience of eating a meal that is served completely fondue style and we enjoyed it. We weren't able to finish any of the courses and still left very full.

I have to say that while I ate plenty at dinner I have a great non-scale victory to share about that afternoon.

I didn't pack any snacks for our hotel, so after lunch I didn't sit around the hotel room munching away mindlessly. This meant that I was plenty hungry when dinner time rolled around.

This is good for me, who has always tended to bring along lots of snacks and associated hotel stays with junk food. :)

After dinner we enjoyed shopping around for the 15-20 minutes the shops were still open and I picked up a little something at Pottery Barn, which I love. love. love. (even though I can't afford the majority of their stuff). We also drooled through the windows at Williams-Sonoma, which we both love. love. love. (and I just learned is associated with PB, which explains why I love them both...)

It was nice to get away for a night and spend time with the man who has been by my side literally through "thick and thin" these past 16 years. He's been supportive if I want to lose weight and non-judgmental if I was gaining or maintaining; and through it all he has loved me no matter what.

Yep, he's a keeper and I look forward to many, many more years by his side, though hopefully taking up less space in the future. *giggle*

Busy Start

2011-09-26T15:07:00.001-05:00

Well, I'm off to a busy week already. Whew! It's good though and I'm not complaining.

I'll write more tomorrow, but suffice it to say today that I had a great weekend and the scale wasn't up this morning. That's always nice, especially when restaurant meals are included in the weekend.

More tomorrow! : )

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other Part 3

2011-09-23T06:02:00.006-05:00

Today's Weight: 188 . 0

Loss/Gain: + 1 . 5 lbs

All I feel like is...It figures. I'm still putting one foot in front of the other, making better choices this week and then TOM comes and threatens to ruin my attempts at getting back on track. I say threatens because I have:

Been tracking my food.
Drank at least 64 oz. of water daily, and more many days.
Making much better food choices, both in portions and types of food.
Pushed myself in exercise a few times this week.
Made some serious decisions about what needs to be done to finish what I've started.

The number on the scale doesn't show any of this, but I know that I've done fine for this week. Some things can't be helped and TOM is one of them.

I had a good conversation with my ~~therapist~~ friend earlier this week and we were discussing how I usually settle around 180-190 when trying to lose weight. hhmmm....maybe, we thought, my body is comfortable here, because I can still eat what I want pretty much and not gain.

Well, it's time to get uncomfortable, because at 5' 4" this is not a healthy weight.

So, that's my goal for this week. I'm going to make myself a little uncomfortable, work to stretch myself out of what's easy into what takes a little more work. I think good things will come of this.

In the meantime, I'm off to prepare for a fun weekend. Have a great Friday yourself and please don't forget to stop by and meet Sarah if you haven't already.

Meet Sarah

2011-09-22T06:55:00.005-05:00

Today I'd like you to meet Sarah. Sarah and I became friends when our oldest children were toddlers. We've enjoyed many years of laughing, giggling, hanging out, scrapping and oh you know, the typical girl stuff best friends do. Though we haven't lived near each other for seven years it hasn't killed our friendship, thanks to Skype, cell phones and email. :)

While I've never thought of Sarah as having a weight problem I know she has had her own struggles to face. She's been a great example of nipping things in the bud weight wise before they become an overwhelming problem.

Through "thick and thin" Sarah has always been there for me and I so appreciate her friendship and support. She's offered a good balance of encouragement and support when I'm losing and non-judgmental friendship when I'm not.

Now that we are both physically active and paying more attention to how we eat I have a feeling the next time we visit together it might just be for a run and then lunch. :)

And now...Sarah!

ON HEALTH:
When did you become interested/concerned about getting healthy?
Before I turned 30, I always heard people say "Everything changes when you turn 30." I thought it was a silly thing to say, UNTIL I turned 30! I realized I couldn't eat whatever/when ever I wanted to. To be totally honest, I saw a picture of myself and at first glance I thought it was my older sister. At that point, I knew that I wanted to keep my weight down, and be healthy.

Did you have any health issues that lead you to change your lifestyle? No.

ON WEIGHT:
Have you ever struggled with your weight? After I had my daughter, who is now 10, I was determined to NOT stay at my post pregnancy weight/pant size. Being a size 12/14 at the time devastated me. Because my family has a tendency to be overweight, I try to stay aware of my weight gain.

What are your must-have foods that you keep on hand at all times to keep you "on plan"? Fresh fruit. One way I get myself to drink more water is to keep sugar free singles to go on hand.

ON EXERCISE:
What part does exercise play in your life? I know if I don't exercise, I will not maintain. Plus, exercising is something that I do for ME. In the summer, I would get up and take a 3 mile run before the kiddo's got up. Now that school is in, I take my kids to school and head to a neighborhood to run.

What kind(s) of exercise do you do and how often? I run/walk 3-5 miles, four or five times a week. If I have extra time, I will go to the gym a couple times a week.

Was it hard to begin exercise, or have you always been an active person? My husband and I started running on the treadmill in India, when we had a lot of "free time". At first, I couldn't run for a continuous 5 minutes. I worked up to run a 5 K, then I ran my first 10K a year and a half ago. I will be running my 3rd 10K this weekend! :)

ON LIFE:
Do you have a family? A job? I've been married to my wonderful husband, Aaron for 16 years and we have two awesome kids, ages 14 and 10.

How has your healthiness journey impacted your family life I have gotten my family to eat more fruits and veggies. I've noticed recently, that my 14 year old son will decline cookies and extra chips. ~ He is making better choices on what he is eating too.

Do you find it hard to stay "on plan" or fit in exercise with all the duties of being wife and mother? Not really, because I am a SAHM, I am blessed to have the time toexercise, cook and have healthy dinners for my family.

What have been your hardest struggles, physically or mentally, while living a healthy life? It's kind of funny. You know the saying "A second on your lips....forever on your hips." ~ I try to remember that. I have found myself taking a snack, lets just say, a candy bar. I'll open it and set it on the counter...take a nibble here and there...then I'll realize that the WHOLE thing is gone and I didn't even REALLY enjoy it. I ate the candy bar because it was there, and then, because I don't "remember" eating the sugar, I'll go to the pantry looking for another snack. I try not to eat on the run anymore. When I want a snack, I'll sit and enjoy it. ~

If you could narrow it down to a few helpful hints to being healthy, what would you say? I have a friend who always says "I'm going to start my diet tomorrow." ~ In the mean time, she's put on another 10 lbs waiting for tomorrow. If you're going to start having a healthier lifestyle, start today. Start with small steps.

I Was Tardy, but I Still Worked Hard

2011-09-20T14:17:00.005-05:00

Today I was going to return to the Spin Class, but I was running late. When I got there every single bike was taken. wow. I wasn't worried about arriving right at the class start time because last week there wasn't a full class.

I was disappointed, but knew it was my own fault for assuming it would be a smaller class. Since I was already at the gym I hopped on the elliptical for 45 minutes. I hadn't seen a sign about the general 30-minute usage time on cardio equipment, but I did keep my eyes out to see if anyone was waiting.

Since no one was waiting I went ahead and did the full 45 minutes, plus a 5-minute cool down.

It was hard and great all at the same time. I'm not sure if the levels are the same as the machines I used in OK. If they were I was a little lower on the levels; however, I did a "random" workout that automatically raised and lowered the intensity at random intervals.

Whew, was I sweaty! I had a towel with me and was grateful for it when the sweat was dripping off my chin and then into my eyes. Yes, it flew off my chin and into my eyes...for those who were paying attention to the order of events....Just kidding. :)

Besides the people I see on the elliptical at the gym I don't know many who actually like to use that machine. I LOVE IT!

There's something about it that I love. I feel so strong when I am pushing myself and seeing the miles go by in ways I have yet to see in my running. It tempted me to start going to the gym regularly again, but I want to enjoy my outside walks/runs as long as possible.

There's a step class on Thursday that I might try, if I get there early enough. LOL

Embarrassed, But Fighting

2011-09-19T12:25:00.004-05:00

I didn't wax poetic after my weigh-in on Friday because I really feel I have nothing to say that hasn't already been said; and then with the weight not coming off that's proof I'm not doing what needs to be done to truly be on a "weight loss journey".

There have been a few small changes in what I am keeping in the house, whole wheat bread, Cheerios instead of the high-sugar cereals, amongst a few things, but writing about that and receiving kudos for making good choices seems hypocritical when we're also eating a freshly made "autumn cake" with homemade cream cheese frosting and bacon-wrapped hot dogs.

I'm tired of where I'm at and I know what needs to be done, but I'm figuring out if I think it's worth the time and trouble.

That sounds like I'm giving up, but I'm not...I'm just deciding what I will be willing to do to reach my goal weight. Because the truth of the matter is I have to be willing to do it.

I want to lose the weight, I want to feel better, but obviously not enough to be willing to do what it takes.

Honestly, I'm embarrassed. It's embarrassing to have a "weight-loss blog" that shows no weight lost so far this year. However, this is all part of my journey, my story, and I refuse to quit and give in to the I-love-food, so-I'll-always-be-fat mindset.

Since I refuse to quit I'm reevaluating what needs to be done and working some things out. I'll definitely be back to tell you about things as they occur. Just please know that I do not take lightly the fact that I've been maintaining for the last six months when I'm not close to a healthy weight. I have thoughts on one reason why I might be where I'm at, and I'll write on that as time allows in my week.

In the meantime, thanks for bearing with me. I have to remember, this is MY new ending and a new ending takes a whole lot more work than sticking with the old comfortable one. For me anyway. Dang it.

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other Part 2

2011-09-16T12:16:00.002-05:00

Today's Weight: 186 . 5

Loss/Gain: 0 . 0

I really don't have anything to say. I was down yesterday, then spent the day driving, about 5-6 hours total, and this morning I'm up and showing a maintain. I had a feeling this would happen with the driving, but it will all even out eventually.

I'm still putting one foot in front of the other and keepin' on.

That's all for today. Please don't forget to stop and meet Stephanie if you haven't already.

Meet Stephanie

2011-09-15T06:00:00.002-05:00

Today I'd like to introduce you to my long-time friend, Stephanie. We've been friends since about 6th grade and laugh at how we are closer now in areas we never dreamed we'd be. She's been by my side throughout my entire weight loss journey. She has the patience of an angel and whether it's a text with a question or weight victory, or a phone call moaning and groaning about weight struggles she is, and has always been, there for me.

After reaching her weight loss goal she ran her first half-marathon in July 2010. Stephanie inspires me to be more, to rise above past failures and to push myself harder than ever; both in my weight loss journey and in life in general.

And now...Stephanie!

Before at about 160-165 pounds.....

... and today with her beautiful family!

Hello to all of “My New Ending’s” readers! I am included in that “reader” category, but feel even more blessed to have known Leah for many, many years! Some of you may remember me from last year when I did a guest post for Leah on how much Leah and her healthiness journey means to me. Today, however, she asked that I talk about a few things regarding my own weight loss fight. I hope that in some way it can encourage, inspire and uplift those of you who are continuing your own weight-loss/maintenance adventure. So without further ado-I will answer away!

ON HEALTH:

When did you become interested/concerned about getting healthy?

To be quite honest, I wasn’t necessarily concerned with the “healthy” part of weight loss when I first started in April of 2009. I had just had my daughter and decided that after my 8-week checkup, I was going to do what needed to be done to lose the 40 or so pounds that I had gained with her and my son. It wasn’t until about a year later that I started learning about what healthy really means. Don’t kill me here, but I started watching The Biggest Loser on-line and Bob and Jillian’s approach intrigued me. Interestingly, as a side note – I was listening to one of her podcasts and the thing she said bugged her the most about BL is that there was a lot of hype and drama, but no real information. I just laughed! That was exactly what I felt about the show and so started digging on my own for my own information, and THAT’S when I started the concern for my health – not just a skinnier body.

Did you have any health issues that lead you to change your lifestyle?

I have been incredibly blessed with a very healthy body – one that has not been sick very often and will do just about anything I ask it to do. That being said, it has been interesting to remember how I felt having the extra weight tagging along with me. I was just getting to the point where my knees were starting to hurt a little and I was VERY uncomfortable in my own skin. I was somewhat embarrassed by my body and did not dress very well. I did not get heavy enough that it hindered my daily activities, but I definitely felt the extra weight.

ON WEIGHT:

Have you ever struggled with your weight?

Boy howdy – Leah and I have talked this question over a million times huh buddy?? I have not and never will be the skinny little nothing standing next to you with the size 0 skinny legs and arms! In saying that, I have always viewed myself as heavier than other girls/women. (some of that view is because of how I am shaped – I carry all of my extra weight in my upper legs and always felt they made me look fat.) I have struggled to lose weight and yes I have struggled keeping the extra weight off. Some of that is perceived overweight-ness (is that a word), and some of that is real excess fat. One thing I always loved about my mom growing up is she never said anything about me being overweight (cuz lets be real – I wasn’t THAT overweight as a kid), she always just reminded me that I needed to keep moving and watch what I eat. Never diets or anything like that – just kept me involved in ballet and PE and called it good.

If you needed to lose weight, what steps did you take to begin?

Wow – that is a heavy duty question! Looking back now, I may have done some things differently, however, this is all about lifelong learning and I have learned many valuable things since I started my weight loss 2 years ago. I think the first and most important step was deciding that I was going to do it and then putting some small things in motion. For example, I knew that after I had my daughter, I was going to lose the weight come Heck or Highwater. So to do that I decided I was going to count WW points (I didn’t join at that point) and was going to start exercising. I didn’t say how often I was going to exercise, but knew I needed to get at least 3 days in to make somewhat of a difference. Those were the only things I “decided” on and I did them.

What are your must-have foods that you keep on hand at all times to keep you "on plan"?

My must haves include:

Fage, non-fat, plain, Greek yogurt (I do my own mix-ins and currently hate the ones with added fruit or whatever – sorry)
Plain walnuts and almonds
Craisins (cuz I like those better than raisins)
Oatmeal
Apples
Strawberries
Frozen blue or mixed berries
Kashi Go Lean Cereal
Flat-out wraps
Sliced turkey or roast beef
Spinach
Chicken breasts
Green leaf lettuce, tomatoes and carrots

If I have all of these in my house I can eat for a week or more! (course it may be the same thing, but I could do it!)

ON EXERCISE:

What part does exercise play in your life?

Exercise now has played a huge role in me being able to lose the weight and inches I’ve carried with me since I was in high school. ( Shhhhhh – don’t tell but I’m in a smaller size now than I was in high school!)

What kind(s) of exercise do you do and how often?

I do a Jillian circuit workout 3 to 4 days a week (mostly 4) and then run on my 5^th day. I try to keep my workouts between 45 and 60 minutes each.

Was it hard to begin exercise, or have you always been an active person?

I have to say I’m not a huge fan of exercise, but knowing that it is an integral part of weight loss/maintenance I have come to terms with it. I have to say that I am not an outdoors type of person – never have been. I would rather be inside reading a book. But I love what I’m doing right now and it’s working. I’ve always done some sort of activity, whether it be ballet and swimming when I was younger, being a football stat’s girl (and running my butt off while carrying equipment around), aerobics while I was in college, or running as I’ve gotten older, I have tried to keep myself as active as I can so that I can be in shape.

ON LIFE:

Do you have a family? A job?

I am so blessed to have a wonderful, supportive husband (who also just lost the last of about 70 pounds and looks hotter than when we got married – no joke) and 2 beautiful kids who keep me on my toes. My current job is running the family household and that is enough for me at this point in my life!!!!

How has your healthiness journey impacted your family life?

It has been a huge blessing for me to have a husband who has always counted physical fitness as a must. He used to be a personal trainer and is more in-to the weight lifting and body building aspect of activity. It has always been fairly easy for him to lose/gain weight. So in turn, it was easy for me on my journey to healthiness, because he just jumped right along. Of course there were times where I thought I was gonna strangle him if he asked me if I wanted ice cream for the hundredth time!!! But we have both come to a place where we are ready to do some research and figure this stuff all out so we can help some other people who may be struggling too! And my kids are young, so it has been fairly easy to just incorporate healthier foods and activity as a part of our lives.

Do you find it hard to stay "on plan" or fit in exercise with all the duties of being wife and mother?

When I first started, I did have a hard time fitting in all that is required for weight loss. I had to go through the whole mental struggle of “I need to do this so I can be strong and healthy to take care of my family.” Once I found that I needed to do this to make a difference for my family, I have made it a priority to buy the nutritious food that is needed and making the time every day to get my exercise in.

What have been your hardest struggles, physically or mentally, while living a healthy life?

I think one of the hardest things to overcome for me is getting the mental image of the “fat girl” out of my head and realizing that I am worth taking care of both physically and mentally. It is ok for me to need some time to do this for myself. I struggle a little with “boredom” eating and am working on how to move that out of my life. And the final thing I struggled with was learning that the ways I perceived food and “how much” you should eat or “how little” or what to eat when, was very skewed and it has taken me some time to get those back into right perspective to make sure I maintain all that I have worked for.

If you could narrow it down to a few helpful hints to being healthy, what would you say?

I would say:

- Make the time to do this for yourself and your family

- Drink LOTS AND LOTS of water (I drink over 100 oz a day and I’m 5’0 feet tall)

- Eat every 4 hours so your body does not go into starvation mode.

- Keep your trigger foods OUT OF THE HOUSE!

- Keep some healthy snacks in your house for you and your kids.

- Make yours and your families lunches for work and school if possible.

Thanks, Stephanie, oh and if you'd like to see more of what she has to say in the future check out the new blog she and her husband have started. He has a great weight loss testimony as well! Click here for more.

New Pain re: Spin Class

2011-09-14T14:35:00.003-05:00

So I had to laugh as I leaned forward on our dinner table last night and felt a pain in my forearms. I was like, "What in the world??" and then it hit me, "My arms are sore where I leaned on them when I was leaning forward on the spin bike!!!"

Now, that's a pain I never expected to experience from a spin class. :) My husband could see the slight discoloration, like a bruise on my front of my forearms.

Boy, do I have plenty of room to improve if I leaned on my arms so much they were almost bruising. Sad...

Stop by tomorrow to meet another friend of mine as she shares about her weight loss journey.

My First Spin Class

2011-09-13T11:54:00.002-05:00

Today I decided to try a spin class at the gym on base. (We are military and one of the benefits is free access to any gym on base.)

Whoa Boy!! That class KICKED MY BUTT. I'm telling you what...

Prior to the class I asked the instructor if she'd tell me how to adjust my bike, etc. and she was very helpful. She gave me a few beginner hints, one of which was "Try and stay at the RPMs, even if you have to lower your resistance on the bike."

Here's a a YouTube video of an example of a spin class in case you don't know what it looks like. Stay at the RPMs sounded like great advice.

Yea, um, okay. Great!

Not.

I couldn't even keep up the fastest RPMs and when I lowered my resistance my feet were coming off the pedals. Soon after they slipped she said something like "If you're feet are flying out of the pedal holders, then up your resistance." So I upped the resistance and just pushed my speed as fast as I could get these chubby legs to go.

It was an hour class and about halfway through I was thinking, "Why am I doing this again????????????????" *grin*

It's amazing how you can feel so strong when walking, or jogging or doing something you're used to, but throw in a new activity and you feel so out of shape.

No, I take that back, I didn't feel so out of shape. I know there's no way I could've done that class at 231 pounds, or even last year maybe. I also looked in the mirrors to see where I was compared to others in the class and I was about middle to lower middle. Some were keeping up great, some were lagging farther behind than I.

That's good. Not the worst, but with plenty of room for improvement.

I'll definitely try and keep going every Tuesday just for the change in variety. In the meantime I need to figure out a way to keep an ice pack on my bottom and, er, uh in the, um, "down there". Bike seats are not comfortable. *giggle*

Have a good day!

p.s. I've added the Daily Mile widget to my blog so you can see what I do for exercise each day. It helps me have somewhere to write down my workouts and stay accountable. And it's fun ...the real reason... =)

Remembering

2011-09-11T07:18:00.005-05:00

I lived on the other side of the country when the twin towers were attacked, but I'll never forget that day.

Last week I saw an article with a photo of a girl my son's age who lost her father that day and realized had my son lost his father on September 11,2001 he would've never known him, because his first birthday was the very next day. It broke my heart.

If you lost anyone close to you in that tragedy, please know that I am saying a prayer for you today as you remember. And please know...

We will not forget.

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other

2011-09-09T05:50:00.005-05:00

Today's Weight: 186 . 5

Loss/Gain: -2 . 5

Total Loss So Far: -44 . 5

Short Story:

I'm glad to see this loss because I have been careful this week to eat and move like I'm trying to lose weight. I'm emotionally at a point where I have to get back to basic and just put one foot in front of the other. I'll do what I know needs to be done to see weight loss and plan on seeing the scale go down in the process.

Long Story:

I'm glad to see a loss this week as I know I've been watching my portions and staying on track. It's been a good week health wise. I've been doing my best to listen to that little voice in my head that says things like, "Do you need that?" "Are you really hungry?" "Is that the best choice to snack on?" 99% of the time I've put something back because of that little voice and I think it helps.

I had a few really hard emotional days this week and just didn't know what else to do. The struggles didn't have anything to do with weight except that I did come to a decision about how I'm going to continue in my journey and get back on track.

I'm going to work on losing weight.

Simple, huh? What I mean by that simple statement is that I'm going to go back to the basics of weight loss.

Eat only when hungry and until satisfied, not full.
Pick healthier food options.
Drink at least 64 oz. of water daily.
Exercise 4-5 days a week.

I haven't been doing all of this. I've also been trying to think of what exercise I can do, or what special meal plan I can follow that would help get me back on track.

Instead of stressing about details I'm going to get back to keeping it simple. Calories in versus calories out.

I will eat healthier, but I will not stress if I eat something high in calories as long as it's in a weight loss portion. (ie. the 1 cup of potato cheese soup and 1/2 tuna melt I had for dinner the other night.)

I will exercise regularly, but I will not stress about whether I feel it's working me hard enough. It might be running, a weight/toning workout, a class, a workout DVD or just a good brisk 45-60 minute walk. I will just get something done each day.

My issues are more with food and how much I eat, and I need to stay focused on getting that back under control and getting to a healthier weight. However, knowing exercise is an integral part to a healthy lifestyle I will for sure exercise. I've just decided to quit living under the pressure of what kind of exercise will make me lose weight better. Eating less will help with weight loss as well and that's where my problem is. I don't want to be the fat runner, or the very fit chubby girl. I need to quit ignoring my overeating and justifying it with heavy duty exercise.

So, to sum it up I'm going to put one foot in front of the other - nothing more nothing less. As long as I'm doing that I plan to go forward in my weight loss journey. Right now I can't emotionally commit to anything more. I've been on this journey too long to be all "rah! rah!", so I will just keep going.

As always, I refuse to give up. I will win this war. :)

Have a great weekend everyone! If you haven't already, don't forget to meet my friend Kelly.

Meet Kelly

2011-09-07T17:19:00.012-05:00

September is here and with it the "back-to-school" feeling is in the air. Kids are excited about a new year (some of them - LOL). Teachers are excited to get back to work (ditto). And moms, like me, are probably excited at the opportunity to get back to the gym, or at least get back on track with their healthy lifestyle. I thrive on the schedules that come with school time and I feel like my life gets back into some semblance of order when the new school year rolls around.

To go along with this "back-to-school" feeling I thought I'd share interviews of three close girlfriends of mine who are each working on their healthiness journeys. I'll be sharing one a week through the end of September. My hope is that those of us who are trying to get back on track will be encouraged by their stories and maybe even learn a thing or two.

Today I want to introduce you to Kelly.

I've known Kelly since about 3rd/4th grade. Though we've spent most of our lives living in different cities we keep in touch regularly and we're always able to chat like the old friends we are when we're together. She is a strong Christian woman and her faith shows in her devotion to God, her husband and four children. I'm amazed at the energy Kelly has to keep her busy life going and still take great care of herself!

And now....Kelly's thoughts...

ON HEALTH:
When did you become interested/concerned about getting healthy? I became interested in becoming a healthy eater when I saw how much it could and would impact my weight; something I never even thought about until my son Isaac was born.

Did you have any health issues that lead you to change your lifestyle? Yes my mother has Celiac Disease and the older I get I seem to be inheriting some of the problems that go along with that. It definitely has changed my desire to eat the things I shouldn't because I feel so miserable after doing so. I also am in perimenopause and that has had a lot to do with my weight going up and down; and emotionally it has been a challenge that I am slowly over coming. I have seen that the wrong kinds of food ie. lots of sugar and heavy carbs have made my symptoms much worse.

ON WEIGHT:
Have you ever struggled with your weight? I never even thought of "dieting" until my youngest child was born. It went downhill from there until I decided I was tired of complaining about it and went to a very informative health class at my local Sprouts. It was there I learned about low glycemic and lower carb foods and the impact they have on your blood sugar, and how that affects your weight.

If you needed to lose weight, what steps did you take to begin? I think the most effective plan for me to help keep my weight down (and yes I still struggle at times) is to eat my vegetables and fruits and lower carb (notice I did not say No carb); and I try to eat smaller mini meals 2-3 hours apart.

What are your must-have foods that you keep on hand at all times to keep you "on plan"? Nonfat Greek yogurt is my favorite. I eat it with honey or make a smoothie with frozen strawberries and spinach. Its a great meal as well as a low calorie snack. Boiled eggs are an easy go too with fruit. I also love hummus with mini peppers. I always try to combine a lower fat protein with a good carb, usually peppers, cucumbers, and salad. If I could have the high fiber pasta I would eat it too, but I can't :( . It bothers my digestive system too much. 100-calorie pack of nuts are also a great snack idea.

ON EXERCISE:
What part does exercise play in your life? I can eat great but if I don't exercise I don't lose, so it's definitely a neccessity! Plus I feel so good when I'm done.

What kind(s) of exercise do you do and how often? It varies on my mood. haha Right now I'm into running. I've never been a runner, started out just walking with my husband, but he pushed me into doing interval run/walking and now I"m really liking it a lot. I just ran 3 miles for the first time ever in my life in 30 mins and it felt awesome. I have some good dvds I pop in for variety, mostly a mix of cardio and weights. I'm trying for 5 days a week sometimes I only get in 4 though.

Was it hard to begin exercise, or have you always been an active person? This was a tricky question for me cause I'm a very active person, but because of the hormonal activity or lack of it in my body it was very diffficult for a while to get motivated to get out and exercise, which is what I needed to feel better. Once I got started it was easier to keep going. My husband started exercising with me too and that was a great help to me.

ON LIFE:
Do you have a family? A job? Yes I have an awesome husband that I have been married to for 17 years and 4 kids ranging from 15 to 7 yrs of age. Lets see, I am a wife, mother, chauffeur, house-cleaner, Pastor's wife, referee, cook... Oh wait I'm a stay at home mom! Thats a full time job! I just started a part time job that is only a few hours a week, just enough to give me a little extra spending$.

How has your healthiness journey impacted your family life? Much to my kids chagrin! One of the biggest changes we've made is hardly ever eating cereal, now we eat oatmeal, eggs, yogurt, things like that. I have tried to various degrees to try to eliminate "processed " foods. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. We don't eat out a lot and I'm always sneaking veggies in sauces and smoothies. We eat lots of fruit and although I can't eat the whole grain stuff thats what I feed to the rest of my family. As a result my dear hubby lost 20lbs without even trying.

Do you find it hard to stay "on plan" or fit in exercise with all the duties of being wife and mother Sometimes. Over the summer I felt like I slacked off a lot in my excercise and even eating healthier; as a result I didn't feel that good. I was really tired and sluggish. Now that the kids are back in school I have been able to focus once again on taking care of myself, watching what I'm putting in my mouth. I have more alone time to go ahead and make that commitment 4 or 5 days of the week to go running/walking.

What have been your hardest struggles, physically or mentally, while living a healthy life? The hardest thing for me is realizing that if I don't stay on target with my exercise and eating healthy, and yes that does include portion control, those extra 20lbs come on way too quick. I've made the mistake of being extremely disciplined and losing 40lbs only to have it come back because I got lazy. So I see its a lifestyle that I must maintain. Its not easy but it is rewarding.

The issues I've had concerning my hormones have made things very difficult and thankfully with the help of biodentical hormones it has helped a lot with the mental aspect of living healthful. Its hard to be healthy when your depressed, stressed, and tired all the time and thats what I was. I'm convinced that most women who are diagnosed with depression and even mental illness have unbalanced hormone problems and if they got them checked out they would not need the medication they're on. Your hormones control every part of your body including your weight. I had to really cry out to God for help in this area and I know that He led me in the right direction to get help.

If you could narrow it down to a few helpful hints to being healthy, what would you say?

Get your exercise in, even if its only 20-30 mins a day, you are worth the time for yourself!
Take a break every once in a while.
You might have to say No to some things.
When you feel "snacky" have some fruit and a little protein, it helps.
Drink Water its good for you.
Last but not least you need a good friend to encourage you. I have been very encouraged by my friend Leah and her blog and I cherish her friendship in so many ways!

Liebster Award & A Fact

2011-09-07T14:42:00.008-05:00

First off, I want to thank Jane for awarding me the Liebster Award. I googled "Liebster" and this blog said "Liebster is German for friend or love." The point of the award to is to recognize blogs with less than 200 followers. I am to pick 5 blogs to share with you, so here are my picks.

Jodie at ~~Bigger Than a Baby Elephant~~ It's Never Too Late to be Who You Might Have Been has been such a great encouragement to me as I've been working on getting back with the program in my weight loss journey. She is also a mother of twin girls, like me, so that holds a special place in my heart. :)
Christine at My Life...is so encouraging and is a great testimony to not giving up on yourself when finding the perfect balance in weight loss maintenance, family and well...life.
Prairie Princess at 90 to go is a fairly new weight loss blogger that I've recently started following. She is giving weight loss another try in her life and the fact that she is not giving up on herself is great! I appreciate her love of writing!
Jesseybell at Getting Fit Again in My 40s may not like me for sending people over to check her blog out (forgive me *grin*), but I'm so glad to see her continuing to press on though weight loss has been a great struggle in her life lately. I know we can all relate and it never hurts to go support those that are still fighting the fight.
Pam at Mr & Mrs. Meltaway is BACK!!!! I'm so thrilled to see her not giving up on the battle after everything she's been through the past year, year and a half.

And here's a funny a friend of mine shared with me today. A little known fact she read on Real Simple magazine's website today....

“Research tells us that fourteen out of any ten individuals like chocolate." -Sandra Boyton

Amen!! *giggle* Have a great day!

Weigh-In ... Just a Number

2011-09-02T10:29:00.000-05:00

Today's Weight: 189 . 0
Loss/Gain: - 1 . 0
Total Loss So Far: - 42 . 0 lbs

Yesterday I read a chapter in Made to Crave about the scale being just a number to mark where you at - it is not a dictator of who you are as a person. I was feeling very good about my week, completely agreeing with what was said, thinking how I'd post about it at some time because it was so true, but not feeling like I needed to really get a grip on that subject for myself.

Until this morning.

Then I was crushed that I was only down a pound. I weigh daily and had seen lower numbers on the scale in the week, so seeing 189 was a vex. I've had a good week and felt that number didn't correctly portray my progress.

I was so vexed I didn't want to run today, or exercise for that matter. I wanted to sit and cry and forget it all. Instead I put on my tennis and went out for what I thought would be a walk; it ended up being C25K Week 4 and another mile of walking afterwards for a 3-mile, 47-minute workout.

As I'm feeling better, I'm now reminded of a quote from the chapter on the scale:

"We can step on the scale and accept the numbers for what they are -- an indication of how much our body weighs -- and not an indication of our worth." - Lysa Terkeurst

I had major breakthroughs in my thoughts this week, both in general and with food. I tracked about 85% of my food, exercised three days and 99% of the time I didn't eat beyond full. I didn't feel drawn to food at all times and I respected when my body was full and didn't snack in the evenings.

The fact that I didn't eat beyond full and didn't snack later in the evenings when I wasn't hungry was HUGE for me, so I'm choosing to be content. I made great progress this week and in time it will show up on the scale, even if it is only a pound a week.

Walking and Weather

2011-09-01T17:16:00.005-05:00

We are having some of the most beautiful weather lately!! With the cooler morning temperature I couldn't resist going for a walk today for my exercise.

I needed something from the grocery store, so I decided to kill two birds with one stone and briskly walk to the grocery store. I grabbed my little "walking purse", threw in ID, money, keys and my phone and headed out to walk my errand. It was just lovely out.

Okay a question and confession here....

So, I'm wondering...if you are still above your goal weight...do you ever see someone who is thinner than you and think "That's what I want to look like." or "Hey, she's not skin and bones, but she has a nice figure. Yea, I'd like to look like that. " ?

Well, today as I was headed back to my house on my walk I was behind a lady briskly walking her dog. She was thin with a nice figure, but not ~~model~~ stick thin. My pace matched her and I thought to myself, "If I can just keep walking every day and look like that I will be content with my health."

Then I met up with the lady and she was a very nice lady. I wanted to ask her if she does anything else for exercise but we were talking about other things.

Anyway, now you know a weird thing I do, which is embarrassing for the good friends of mine who read my blog - LOL.

However, that is one of my long term life goals...to be able to go for brisk walks daily until I'm old and gray. If I can push myself before then and do more, great; but if I can stay healthy while solely walking for exercise, that's fine with me too.

Especially on beautiful days like today! ;)

A Funny & Good Day

2011-08-31T14:51:00.004-05:00

My mom sent this to me today:

“I went to the 30^th reunion of my preschool. I didn’t want to go, because I’ve put on, like, a hundred pounds.” -Wendy Liebman

As for my week so far:

Eating is going fine & I'm tracking daily.
I got a run in today and kept a decent pace (for me) during the running intervals.
The kids are back on a regular school schedule now.
We got a second car, so I can run my errands in the daytime again.
The weather has been real nice - a lovely 71 degrees when I went out to exercise at 9:00 am.
I'm still reading Made to Crave and learning.
I've started a new book, The Help, and it's enjoyable so far.
I've had good chats with two long-time close friends this week.
There is food on the table.
The bills are paid.
No one is sick.

Yep, it's a good day over here and I'm thankful to God for it. I hope you're having a good one wherever you're at.

Time Consuming Thoughts

2011-08-29T11:55:00.002-05:00

As I read in chapter 6 of Made to Crave earlier today I was really struck by this question in the 'Personal Reflections' at the end of the chapter.

"As Christians, our calling -- and our source of spiritual nourishment -- is to do God's will and finish His work (John 4:34). To what degree have consuming thoughts about food impacted your ability to pursue your calling and receive spiritual nourishment?"

I realized when I am consumed with food, overeating or snacking when bored, etc, I begin to feel guilty. Those feelings of guilt usually begin roll into a huge burden of shame that then threatens to crush any positive thoughts and leaves a path of worry and wonder behind it.

"Why am I still struggling?" "Why do I do this?" "Haven't I learned anything?"

Many times those crushing thoughts steal away hours in my day and I don't get things done that I need to do. This is usually because I then find myself searching for reasons why I'm doing what I'm doing, reading weight loss stories online or in conversation with a weight loss buddy or even in a book or my Bible.

There is a time and a place for these moments of deep introspection and learning. However, more often than not I'm doing this too often and it becomes a thief of my time. I'm then left with only enough time to do the basic activities of daily living, and sometimes even those things are completed in a rushed manner to make up for lost time.

In a day where I've been consumed with food and weight related worries there is no time for extra things, maybe working on something I've felt God calling me to do like visit with a friend in need or work on a project for church.

Or I may also have lost time in my day for reading a book or working on a family project, and then I am stressed out because I feel I've had no time to myself in the day.

This is not healthy, and it is something I am going to work on.

I am going to work on sticking to my plan, and not letting my mind become consumed with food - in a good or bad way - so that I can have more full, productive days. Our lives where meant to be lived to the fullest, not bogged down with heavy, destructive thoughts or habits.

I know with God's help and my good choices I'll gain a victory in this area of my life. My hope is I'll also begin losing weight again as well.

Safe & Sound

2011-08-27T21:51:00.002-05:00

We made it safe and sound as Irene passed through our area today. The power was off when we woke up, but it came back on around 6:00 pm. It was a rainy day with lots of howling winds.

We are grateful to God for bringing this hurricane down from the level 3 it was expected to be to a level 1.

Thank you to those who prayed and for those on the northeastern coast, you are still in my prayers.

Hurricane Irene

2011-08-26T10:27:00.002-05:00

Quick note: We live in Jacksonville, North Carolina and are preparing to hunker down for the hurricane that is headed up the east coast. Our schools are closing two hours early today and the base, where my husband works, has already been shut down. The city is also beginning to shut down for today so people can get home safely and not in a panic.

If you are a praying person, please keep us and the eastern seaboard in your prayers. We're not expecting the worst of the damage here in NC; however, if Irene doesn't change direction the northeastern coast could be hit much worse.

Thank you.

Weigh-In ... This is Hard

2011-08-26T08:35:00.004-05:00

Today's Weight: 190 . 0

Loss/Gain: + 2 . 5

Total Loss So Far: - 41 . 0 lbs

You can imagine my frustration at seeing this number today. I've seen it most of the week and it's been frustrating all week. I'm not 100% on plan, but to be up to 190 is driving me crazy.

Crazy to point of truly looking at where the problem lies. I've spent time this morning reading through some beginning chapters of Made to Crave by Lisa Terkeurst and looking up in scripture biblical truths with regards to discipline and acceptance.

Yes, acceptance.

I struggle with overeating and lack of discipline when it comes to food, as is obvious by my lack of reaching my goal weight in over two years since trying, but I also struggle greatly with acceptance. My husband, parents and closest friends know this is true. It's my own great mind battle and something I have to overcome.

As I've read through scripture and really made myself sit and look at why I keep reaching for those no-bake chocolate cookies when I'm not hungry (that was an issue this week) or why I keep eating when I'm not hungry I come to some different conclusions. To name a few I realize...

I still see myself as the chubby blonde girl who was the friend of the girls boys liked.
I still see myself as the chubby mom on the sidelines.
I have always made friends easily, and have a very full and happy life, except when it comes to my struggles with food.

As I finished writing up a response to one of her "Personal Reflections" at the end of a chapter I was amazed at what flowed out of my pen. It went like this, "...crazy, but maybe....just maybe I feel like food ALWAYS accepts me, it's dependable, but material things and relationships are much harder, less accepting [or fulfilling]...so I turn to food. BUT I NEED TO TURN TO GOD and 'do all things as unto the Lord and not unto man.' wow. "

For someone who struggles with acceptance and rejection this is very hard for me to put out for you all to read, but since I find it very telling I had to share.

Some may feel I am putting too much emphasis on food and overeating in my life, but I think it's a sign of deeper issues that I'm working through. Being the chubby girl and mom is a comfort zone for me and breaking out of that zone to a woman who is made for more than the vicious cycles of overeating and guilt is very scary.

I have found myself thinking many times, "I'll never be like her (Diane, or Lori, or Stephanie), but as I turn to God (and look at those women's past struggles with food and how they have overcome them) I realize I can be. As Lisa likes to say often in her book, I was made for more.

So, friends in blogland, this is where I am today. Struggling and clinging to the small spark of hope and desire that I will break free from this vicious cycle and be all that God has called me to be in Christ, because I know he didn't call me to be beat down but to stand tall and be an overcomer.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23 & 24

As always, I will not give up. I can't.

Deep Thoughts - Not

2011-08-24T15:35:00.004-05:00

I had something deep and profound to blog about today, but now I can't remember. LOL

It's a "rest" day for my working out, but not very restful otherwise. My kids start school tomorrow and enjoyed a nice, lazy day today.

I did laundry, caught up on blog reading, helped put school supplies in piles so they could ready their backpacks, did more laundry, showered, put chicken to marinate for dinner, etc. etc.

I do know that I'm seeing a reoccurring topic of basically, as one friend worded it "getting the mojo back" with regards to weight loss. I'd like to think that the "back to school" feeling will also help in getting back with weight loss efforts.

Maybe I'll wax poetic on that thought tomorrow...since my train of thought is no where in site right now. *giggle*

Have a good one!

C25K on Hold

2011-08-23T21:04:00.002-05:00

Due to the arrival of TOM yesterday (heavy flow and serious cramps) I did not run today. I rarely workout hard during the heaviest days of my cycle as it is pretty rough on me. Sometimes with Aleve taking away the pain I can get through it, but I had nothing in my system this morning. After the worst days I'm pretty okay, so we'll see if I run later in the week.

I did get my circuit workout done yesterday and a 30-minute Walk At Home DVD done today. This is me adjusting my exercise to my life - still getting it done, but not stressing about it. Yay!

I'm off to bed now...zzzzz....

C25K - Week 3 Day 3

2011-08-20T21:46:00.003-05:00

I got up by 8:00 am this morning and finished week three of the Couch to 5K program. Whee ! The 3-minute runs were a little easier than the first day this week.

I'm finding it harder to keep my faster pace for longer than two minutes, but we'll see how it goes next week. Since I'm getting back into running after a two-month break I'll be content to be able to run for 30 minutes at a 12:00 mile pace by the end of this nine week program. However, I'm shooting for 11:30 if possible. :) We'll see.

After today's run I finished up my first full week of exercise which looked like this:

Sunday - Rest

Monday - Strength Training 1 hr (in the form of circuits in my at home gym, following a plan from JillianMichaels.com.)

Tuesday - Run 30 mins (in the form of Couch to 5K ... Week 3 Day 1)

Wednesday - Rest

Thursday - Run 30 mins (C25K Week 3 Day 2)

Friday - Strength 1 hr (Circuits in my at home gym)

Saturday - Run 30 mins (C25K Week 3 Day 3)

The scale may not have moved this week, but I've felt very good getting back into a regular exercise routine. I plan on sticking to this kind of schedule during the weeks ahead.

It's more of my "new normal" coming back and I love it!

p.s. My husband and I went to our first Officer's Ball at the base this evening and I did very well with my dinner. I had small portions (couple bites of each thing), lots of fresh fruit, and didn't leave feeling at all stuffed. Victory!

G'nite and enjoy the rest of the weekend!

Weigh-In ... Same Scale & New Victory

2011-08-19T09:53:00.006-05:00

Today's Weight: 187 . 5

Loss/Gain: +/- 0

Total Loss So Far: - 43 . 5 lbs

Well, I am choosing to be content with the maintain this week. It is not a gain and for that I am grateful. I am exercising and drinking water again and slowly but surely I am getting to the place I need to be to see weight loss. I have not tracked my food 100%, so that is my goal for this upcoming week.

I do have a non-scale victory (NSV) to share from last night.

After dinner last night I pulled out a pack of Oreos for dessert for the kids. I wanted one, but I knew that I didn't really have calorie room for too much, nor did I need them. I settled on having one cookie, which I ate slowly, finishing it with a sip of my daughter's milk.

Off and on til bedtime I kept thinking about having another one, or having something else, but I knew I didn't need it. I wasn't hungry. We had eaten a very late dinner, so I only had an hour or so before bedtime and I knew I could make it without eating anything more.

Telling myself I didn't need it reminds me of a scripture I came across earlier this week in my Bible reading that is a go-to reminder for me in my weight loss journey... when I choose to follow the advice.

1 Corinthians 6:12 says:

"All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any." NKJV

This includes food and not having more than one Oreo last night was a huge victory for me. I was not brought under the power of sweets. Glory!

C25K - Week 3 Day 2 - Picture Proof

2011-08-18T10:27:00.005-05:00

30 minutes of exercise done!

And now a few photos from my run (yea, I have a little extra time today... LOL).

I hope my Garmin is waterproof, because this is what it looks like after a run/walk on a warm and humid day.

My sleepy heads never did see the note I left them...they were still in bed when I got home.

Maybe this is why the lady looked at me weird when I said, "Good morning!".

I don't wear make-up on morning runs and this white girl gets awfully red exerting energy on warm, humid mornings. LOL

My post-run drink of choice. Low-Cal (read: low sugar) Grape Gatorade.

Thank the Lord for showers and make-up!

Have a good day everyone. I'm off to play a game with my son. We're enjoying our last few days of summer break before school starts next week.

Putting Goals Into Action

2011-08-17T08:48:00.004-05:00

Diane at Fit to the Finish wrote a post today about putting action to our weight loss goals. It spoke directly to me as this is where my problem lies. I have the desire to lose weight, but am not putting into action what needs to be done to see this fulfilled in my life.

This is something I need to seriously get focused on. I want to be a person who has lost the weight and gained control over food in her life, not someone who lost a few pounds and then stayed put.

For today, please feel free to click here and read her post. I have nothing more to say as I need to get with it myself. :)

C25K - Week 3 Day 1

2011-08-16T22:05:00.002-05:00

I went out for my ~~walk/jog~~ run today and my Garmin died about 5 minutes into it. *sigh* So I improvised and just estimated the times judging by how long it takes me to reach certain points ie. a cul-de-sac is about 60 seconds of jogging...etc. etc.

Since I chose to go after doing my devotions I was afraid it would be too warm out, but I made myself do it anyway. It was a nice 73 degrees out at 9:00 am and I enjoyed it.

As I told another blogger today...now if I can get my eating out of vacation mode I'll be doing great. We had company for dinner tonight...they brought brownies...*sigh* my downfall.

I keep telling myself that I need to eat like I'm on a diet and not in maintenance. I will get with it, I must.

My At-Home Gym

2011-08-15T14:16:00.006-05:00

Here is my new at-home gym.

You too can have one of these cool gyms! All you need is:

one enclosed garage (preferably with back door and garage door cracked open for fresh air)
one dining table chair
one set 3-lb hand weights (I have multiple weight sets, but seeing as how I'm sooo out of shape this was good for today). Usually about $5- $10 a pair.
one jump rope purchased for $5 at Marshalls
one timer on cell phone (not pictured)
one printout of exercises to do. (2 core/strength moves followed by 1 min of cardio times 5 different circuits)

and last, but not least.....

one moving box to use as a yoga mat, because I forgot to buy one when I was at the store. :)

Yep, I had my daughter take a picture just so you could see my improv mat. LOL

**************

Today was my first workout circuit from the Jillian Michaels site I've joined recently. It kicked my butt and I don't mind telling you that doing jumping jacks and jumprope post childbirth is not fun..if you get my drift. sheesh.

Enough of that...so tomorrow morning I'll start week 3 of Couch to 5K. I'll run/walk three days a week and I'll do these circuit workouts two days a week for strength.

I will get back into shape again...I think I can...I think I can... :)

C25K - Week 2 Day 3

2011-08-13T09:29:00.003-05:00

I completed week two of the Couch to 5K program this morning. This week was rotating 60 seconds walking/60 seconds jogging for 20 minutes. My jogging pace averages between 10:30-11:00 min mile pace. I am loving my Garmin so it can show me these things. :)

I'd like to sign up for a race this fall, but for now I'm going to content myself with simply getting back into running. If I can complete a 5K (3 . 1 miles) at an 11:00 minute mile pace I'll be thrilled. Even an 11:30/12:00 minute pace would be cool, because the fastest I've ever been so far is to run at an 12:00 minute mile pace for 25 minutes..on a treadmill.

I mention the part about the treadmill because I am now doing all my running outside in my own neighborhood. Another reason I love my Garmin. :)

And to finish up on an even happier note, completing this week of C25K also means that I've exercised for 30 minutes three times this week. Hooray!

p.s. *in hushed tones* I am also loving having a good quality sports bra for running. Girls if you do anything that makes them, ahem, you know, not stay in place..you need to save up for a good sports bra. I don't even notice them anymore when I run, I feel safe and secure and don't have chest pain when it's all over. Woot! And for those who worry about these things...they don't look like you've taped yourself down with duct tape either. LOL

Weigh-In ... Still Figuring It Out

2011-08-12T07:47:00.003-05:00

Today's Weight: 187 . 5

Loss/Gain: + 0 .5

Total Loss So Far: -43 . 5

I woke up this morning, weighed and was at a loss of what to say. I honestly am not totally sure what is going on, except that I know I've had some treats this week. Enough to gain?

Apparently so.

It's a vex when I'm so happy with the healthier meals I'm eating now (they are the silver lining on this cloud of weight gain). However, I've a feeling that my healthier meals might still be too big since I am not exercising regularly right now, or [dramatic pause] I really have to be careful about the treats and dinner portions. As I'm writing I am realizing that is where I trip up each day and I don't have room for excess when I'm not burning anything in exercise.

I'm going to work on this. I'm sick of being stuck up here in the high 180's, especially when I wasn't here while eating tons of fast food on our trip earlier in the summer.

Note to self: Hang in there! :o)

C25K - Week 2 Day 2

2011-08-11T13:38:00.003-05:00

I got up and ran/walked this morning. I can't take all the credit for getting it done. I had to get up at 5:30 to take my husband to work, so I could have the car today, and that's what really woke me up.

But....I still did it.

I actually dressed to workout when I took him, so when I got home I just had to use the restroom and then head out. It was a little cooler and I felt great when I was done. I'm finding it easier to do the running intervals in the mornings. (More on that later)

I'm a bit tired though from being up so early, so I'm sure I'll sleep good tonight. :)

Guilt Trip

2011-08-10T14:02:00.004-05:00

This morning I was supposed to get up early to do another day of Couch to 5K...but I didn't.

I then proceeded to have the worst guilt trip I've had in a long time with regards to exercise. I pretty much fought with myself, beat myself up and took any joy out of sleeping in a little extra.

Monday morning I got up early to run/walk and felt great. I planned on doing it Mon-Wed-Fri each week, and I wasn't going to blog about it until I had completed all three days this first week.

While I know I need the exercise I had a full day planned today and then, for some reason, I was exhausted this morning. This all sounds like excuses, and maybe they are, but when my day finally got going I came across a blog post wherein a lady said she'd put off her running during the summer and would get back to it when the kids go back to school I felt much better.

That's how I've felt most of the summer.

Except for today. Today I felt awful. I finally let myself sleep in telling myself I'd get a workout in later. Which hasn't happened because I did a major cleaning of my bedroom (namely the dresser that has been covered in clutter since we moved in) and then regular weekly housecleaning.

Now that my day is almost spent I'm only slightly feeling guilty for not getting up and running. I do wish I would've done it, because I feel like I fell through on a commitment I made. However, I also know that I've had a very productive day and I don't regret not having time to get the afternoon workout in. By the way, Wednesdays we have church at night, so soon I'll have to shower and get dinner going.

I know when school starts my workouts will fall back into my daily routine. I'm hoping that after another school years worth of workouts I'll be more motivated next summer to get up and workout in the mornings. That's one of those "I wish I could be more like..." feelings I have that maybe someday I'll actually bring to pass in my life.

In the meantime, I had a good dose of guilt today and then I went on with my day. I won't ignore it, but I won't let it ruin everything else for me.

New Meals

2011-08-08T21:09:00.002-05:00

Well, it has been fun trying some new meals this past couple of days. I think the hardest thing for me to get used to so far is the large breakfast, and colder breakfasts.

I have never really eaten yogurt for breakfast and already a few breakfasts called for yogurt. I'm eating them and enjoying some more than others. There was a breakfast parfait with yogurt, flax cereal, berries, almond slivers and honey all layered that was okay, but it was a lot of yogurt and berries for what I'm used to. However, I am really enjoyed yogurt over the waffle. That is yummy.

Tonight I served my family lamb chops with rice and a greek salad. They all loved it and I felt like a fancy cook. It was very nice!

As for hummus as a dip for veggies...I'm not liking that so much. I don't mind it as a sandwich spread, but not dip. At least not the spinach & artichoke one I was dipping my baby carrots in today. blech.

I'm looking forward to a few other recipes to try this week.

Weigh-In ... Eating Plan

2011-08-05T08:39:00.003-05:00

Today's Weight: 187 . 0

Loss/Gain: - 3 . 5

Total Loss So Far: - 44 . 0

Yes, well cutting portions and eating better surely does make a difference on the scale now doesn't it? Normally I'd say something like, "Hopefully this stays off this week."; but today I'm pretty sure I'll keep going down.

As I've been working towards getting back on track with my weight loss journey I've been looking around for some direction, a plan of sorts. Yes, I know what to do, but I really wanted something to guide me a little more strictly, something that would take the thinking out of what foods to eat and teach me.

I toyed with trying NutriSystem or Jenny Craig, or even going back on Weight Watchers, but I didn't want to (A) spend the money or (B) depend on pre-packaged foods. Weight Watchers is a great program, but I also wanted something that provided more than an outline of how much to eat each day.

I wanted something that would tell me what to eat. Something that would show me meal ideas and let me use my joy of cooking while eating better and staying within my calorie budget.

I know this sounds dramatic, but I've been feeling pretty dramatic about it. I wanted something strict that didn't cost so much money.

As I was sharing all of this with my bestest weight loss friend she mentioned a program she's been following to learn how to eat better now that she's on maintenance. She even offered to share some of the meal plans so I could check it out before joining myself. I took her up on her offer and looked into it.

Two days later JillianMichaels.com became my plan of choice to finish off this weight loss journey. Here's a little bit of what I've fallen in love with:

It's about $52 for 13 weeks (approx 3 months) to join and use the site to it's fullest extent.
She starts off by having you complete a survey to see what kind of meal plan is best for your body.
There are meal plans for each week, breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack.
You can change/adapt any meal to fit your day.
There's a workout plan included and each day you're given a workout circuit to follow if you don't have another exercise plan.
There's a weight tracker, fitness tracker and food journal and even a grocery list for each week that is changeable according to what days/meals you are making.
All recipes are printable, so I can store them for future reference.

Also, if I decide I've learned enough in 13 weeks to keep me going I can stop at that point. There is no 1-year agreement or anything beyond each 13 weeks.

So, I've committed to giving this a try for at least these 13 weeks and seeing how well I follow. My plan is to follow her meals for breakfast, lunch and snack 100% daily and then at least 3-4 dinners. This is to accommodate for my family.

My husband was a little worried about eating healthier meals every night of the week, saying he's going to want his "bacon-wrapped hot dogs" every once in a while.

I expected this reaction and planned that I will still make some family favorites so they don't all revolt. It's just that now I'm going to add in some more healthier stuff regularly and hopefully find some really good dinners that my family will love (like they loved fish week).

I'm really excited about this. Yesterday I sat and figured out which meals I would be eating for the rest of this week and next week and put together my grocery list. I went grocery shopping and bought more fruits and vegetables than I've eaten in a long time. :)

I asked my husband if he was nervous and he replied, with complete love and honesty, "Only that you're going to actually cook all this." So, here's my goal for this week...to make sure and stick to every meal and use all my fruits and veggies before they go bad. I am a little worried about stuff going bad since I bought enough for 8-9 days, so that will take some figuring out.

In the meantime, while I know it's not going to be easy (chocolate chip cookies are not on the menu) I'm glad to have a plan to follow. I think I'm going to have to wean myself off of sweets, but I'm going to do my best to stick closely to the plan and I'll share with you all how it's going.

Oh, and in case you're wondering...breakfast today was a 100% whole wheat waffle topped with 1/2 c. low-fat vanilla yogurt and 1/2 c. blueberries. It called for 1 cup of each topping, but I didn't have non-fat plain yogurt, so I balanced out the calories by cutting back the portions.

This is not something I would ever eat for breakfast before, but it was tasty and filling. And that is what I'm excited about - trying new things and feeling good while doing it.

Have a great weekend!

Running? Walking?

2011-08-04T11:33:00.004-05:00

What's that? Any kind of workout for that matter....hasn't made it into my days this week.

I'm simply being honest, before my weigh-in tomorrow.

Just when I thought I was getting into a routine (as much as one gets into a routine during summer break) this week went a little berzerk. Plans changed and I was out and about more than I planned, and waiting on people, so not wanting to get sweaty and run out of time to shower, and just not doing it.

It's not an excuse, I'm only sharing what my week's been like. My kids go back to school on August 25th and I know I'll be back into a regular schedule of working out then for sure.

In the meantime, I'll do what I can/feel like - for we know it's not that we can't it's more that we don't make time/want to. And during summer break I don't always feel like it...yet. someday I will...

I am working on my portion sizes again and better choices and for now I'm content with that progress back towards the narrow path leading to weight loss. :)

Tune in tomorrow for some more special news that is also leading me back to the path of weight loss on my journey. I'm super excited about this!!

Bye for now!

My Emotional Eating Lesson

2011-08-02T21:42:00.002-05:00

When I read "are you an emotional eater? I usually feel like, "No, I don't...except for the emotion of happiness. I love to eat to celebrate or when visiting with friends, etc."

Today I realized that I do indeed eat as an emotional eater sometimes. I was upset about a situation and suddenly had no motivation to take the time to cook anything healthy to eat. So, I ate a hot pocket and Pringles for lunch finishing up with two homemade chocolate chip cookies for dessert. I wasn't overly stuffed, but I knew that wasn't what I needed to eat.

It wasn't until a little while later that I realized I had eaten that junk because I was upset. Wow. I know I should've stuck with my better eating (I had hummus, salad fixins, fruit and enough healthier eats to pick from.), but I took the lazy way out.

This is something I'm going to have to work on..making myself stick to my healthier eating even when I don't feel like making it. Thankfully, later my situation was rectified and I did much better at dinner.

When you're working on weight loss as long as I have been you think you won't learn anything you didn't already know, but today I learned something new about myself. This is definitely why it's a lifelong journey and not just a temporary fix.

My New Ending

Post-Surgery Walk

Weigh-In ... Healing & Motivation to Stay Focused

Sleepytime Survey

Healthy Heart Weekend

Mixed Monday Musings

Weigh-In ... Do I Really Want It?

Taking It Easy

Recovering

Is Life After Weight Loss Possible?

Weigh-In ... Not Low Carb

Movin' It

Rainy Afternoon

One of Those Days

Weigh-In ... 1st of the New Year

..In With the New

Out with the old...

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Final Update

No Weeklong Christmas

Merry Christmas!

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #12

Fun Christmas Cheer

Winter Break

I'm Becoming a Picky Eater

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #11

Fighting Christmas A.D.D.

Go Visit Diane :)

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #10

Thursday Funny - Prayer for 2012

This and That

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #9

A Walk in the Country

Change in Progress

Vacation is Good

Thankful Friday & NSV

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #8

Thankful Tuesday

Thankful Monday

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #7

A Little Fuzzy

Rest & Fluids

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #6

Veterans Day

Buffet NSV x 2

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #5

A Ban

Is It The Jeans?

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #4

Check Our Her Homemade Chicken Broth

I'm Walking

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #3

In My Spare Time

I Caught Myself

My Favorite Breast Cancer Survivor

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #2

No posting because...

Nothin New

Trouble Commenting?

Big Weekend

Weigh-In ... Hot 100 Update #1

Getting It Off My Chest

Awesome Weekend

Weigh-In ... Water & Hot 100 v.2011

Capable of More

ca·pa·ble

24-Hour Getaway

Busy Start

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other Part 3

Meet Sarah

I Was Tardy, but I Still Worked Hard

Embarrassed, But Fighting

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other Part 2

Meet Stephanie

New Pain re: Spin Class

My First Spin Class

Remembering

Weigh-In ... One Foot in Front of the Other

Meet Kelly

Liebster Award & A Fact

“Research tells us that fourteen out of any ten individuals like chocolate." -Sandra Boyton