Today I did not feel like exercising. I just didn't. My monthly discomforts are in full force and even though I was dressed to exercise I didn't feel like going.
But I did.
And as I sat up the things we would need for todays cycle circuit workout I thought to myself, "I showed up."
Just like five years ago this week I showed up.
I was overweight, having pain in my knees and desperate to change something in my life to be in better health. I felt like a failure at the very thought of trying to lose weight again for the umpteenth time.
But I showed up.
I made a commitment to try.
I started this blog to track my journey.
I faced the discomfort and went for it.
And just like today's workout class, I've found myself on the other side of the attempt a successful girl.
What started out as discomfort began to turn into something familiar and when things got tough I just took one more step in the right direction. A few times I even pushed myself harder than normal and as I was putting away my workout equipment I felt strong. I was reminded of where I started and how far I have come.
May 15, 2009 I wrote that this was going to be the last time I lost weight.
And it was. All because I simply showed up.
*deep grateful sigh*
Note: There is this little voice saying, "But you're still trying to lose some weight you gained back..." and you know what? I know. Because that is what maintenance is all about. There's a little losing and a little gaining, but having kept off as much as weight as I have and being as active as I've become is success in my book. So there, little-voice-who-wants-to-keep-me-down. *wink*grin*
Good lessons learned. One I still am struggling with immensely - if I am not feeling 100% awake, not in pain, good, etc. etc. etc. then I blow off exercises. With running I am slowly being able to get out there, mainly because I am a numbers geek and I like to be able to log in miles, but other exercise, even though I log that and occasionally log why I didn't make a schedule workout, it is still way too easy for me to blow them off.
ReplyDeleteYeah for showing up!