"Accept Who You Are"

I subscribe to the daily newsletter sent out by the digital scrapbooking company Scrap Girls.  I found this little excerpt to be very true and thought I'd share it with everyone.

I will be able to change my weight, but not some parts of my body.  That's why I personally agree that it's best to learn to love myself now, so that I will love even more the person hidden under all the extra weight.  

I especially love the last line....

Accept Who You Are

I've spent more than half a century wishing I was something other than I am. I realized my error this morning, as I was blowing my hair dry. Instead of spending a lot of time using a round brush to attempt to get everything to roll under, I flipped my hair over and used my fingers as I dried it, allowing it to go where it wanted.

As I looked at myself in the mirror, I realized that I have hair that many people would enjoy. And yet, I haven't liked it. I believe that to become presentable, I had to tame its behavior. I had to alter it.

Ridiculous.

It is just as silly of me to wish my fair skin, short chin and blond eyelashes away and that is what I have been doing. They are what they are. To wish them away is to wish myself away.

- Ro

"It's a good thing, Mom!"

I haven't worked out at all this week until last night.  I couldn't stand it anymore.  Yes, we were busy.  Monday was Memorial Day, Tuesday the last day of school, Wednesday some shopping with my mother-in-law who is visiting from another state, Thursday a dental appointment and laundry that desperately needed attending to.  On top of our busy schedule we've been staying up waaay too late and of course, who wants to wake up early when you didn't go to bed until midnight, or talked 'til 1:00 am??  But I couldn't stand it...I was feeling so GUILTY!! 

I kept telling myself that it's baby steps and I'll be back on track once my MIL leaves, which is tomorrow, but I couldn't always talk away the guilty thoughts.

So, last night I got out one of my new Leslie Sansone DVDs and decided I would do at least one of the five miles while my husband and MIL went to Wal-Mart.  One of my 11-year-old DDs (I have twin DDs) decided to do it with me.  It's a new DVD called "The 5-day slimdown" - you do a mile a day as they each target something in particular.  So, I decided that I could fit 14-16 minutes of walking into my evening and the laundry would eventually get folded.  

As I'm getting out the DVD my DD says to me, "Mom, it's a good thing you have all of those walking DVDs.  So, if we get fat when we get older we can come and use them to lose weight!" 

LOL !!!  Here's my twiggy thin DD telling me she's glad I'll be able to help them out later if they gain weight when they grow up.  

Well, dear, you bet!! I'll keep these DVDs, keep doing them and if you ever have a problem with your weight as you grow up you are more than welcome to come workout with mom!! 

P.S.  We ended up doing two of the five miles and I felt so much better afterwards.  She was a trooper and made it through the whole two miles..I think she might have even worked up a little bit of a sweat.  :o)

Weigh-In

First an explanation:  Years ago (when I was on WW I think) I got into the habit of weighing myself on Tuesday mornings.  So, I try and stay away from the scale during the week and then weigh myself on Tuesday morning.  

Now for today's weigh-in.... I maintained at 226.5.  Am I upset?  Not at all.  I only worked out three times last week and I've been eating moderately all the yummy mexican food my mother-in-law makes.  So, I was pleased.

I found it interesting that in the book "Body Clutter" she reminds us that the scale is not to be hated..it's only a tool to help us take care of our weight.   I had to remind myself of that this morning.  "It's only a tool.  It's only a tool.", I repeated to myself in my mind.  [grin] 

So, onward and upward.  I'm not expecting great losses when I'm not working my hardest yet.  They will come.  I'm just happy that I haven't gone up and can say I'm still down 5 pounds!

That's What Friends Are For

I have only told a couple of best friends and my mom about my attempt at losing weight again.  I've chickened out from telling one of my best friends though....  She and I have both battled weight loss and are both currently back up at the high end of weight.  She actually lost over 60 pounds a few years ago, but has since gained it all back.

Now I know when I am at my heaviest weight and not in the mood to lose weight it's hard for me to be excited when someone talks about losing weight.  I'm always like, "That's great!" and on the inside I condemn myself for being so fat and then just decide that I don't care even though I'm usually a little jealous that I can't lose the weight myself.

But after eleven years of friendship I can't keep secrets from my friend for too long, so I decided just to let her know about it.  I told her I'd understand if she was skeptical of me since I've tried this before, but I just wanted her to know.  She's so sweet and I had a feeling she'd be supportive no matter what -- that's the kindhearted type of person that she is. 

I was surprised to find out that she has also really been struggling with her weight gain lately.  We chatted for a long time and turns out she could use the encouragement to get motivated to lose some weight also.   Her oldest son is  graduating from high school a year from now and she would like to lose the extra weight by then. 

After all was said and done I was so glad I told her about my weight loss attempt.  I probably spent more time encouraging her and yet that in itself encouraged me.  She's gotten to her goal before, but I never have.  So, now that I'm motivated hopefully I can help her get motivated to take those baby steps to start and she can encourage me to keep going; and together I know we can reach our goals.  Because after all, that's what friends are for, right?  :o) 

To Blog or Not to Blog

As you've noticed, I finally got my weight loss blog up and running today. It took me a while to decide if I was going to blog or not. Honestly, the only thing holding me back was fear. Fear of failure. "What if I blog about it and then never lose the weight?" or "What if I lose the weight and then gain it all back like before?"

However, I've always been so inspired when following other peoples' weight loss blogs. Just seeing that I'm not the only one out there struggling with this and that many others have lost the weight and kept it off has kept me going at times in the past.

So, I decided to put aside my fears and go ahead and start this blog. My plan is to succeed and I know I can make it with baby steps and discipline.

The fear is still there, but I'm trying to face it by starting this blog. Only a few of my closest friends know about it and when I lose my first ten pounds I'll tell more of them. I'm a little nervous to let everyone know that I'm working on weight again and I figure my actions will speak louder than words. When they see the loss, they'll ask and then I'll tell them that I'm working on it again.

In the meantime, if I can encourage even just one person with my blog, then I'm happy.

Current Goals

My current goal is to walk at least three days a week, drink at least 32 oz. of water a day, eat only until satisfied, snack only when truly hungry and then pick fruit or something healthy and not worry about how long this journey is going to take. Baby steps...

New Endings

"Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending. "  ~ Roberta Brenick

I found this quote about a year ago and loved it.  So, I printed it out and made this little reminder for me with my scrapbooking stuff.  I put it in my bedroom where I'll see it every day and be reminded that I can have a new ending as a thin woman, wife and mother.